A story of how I have come through…

My high school friend reminded me that I was the one who created the lyrics and composed, the valedictory song of our high school. When I sit down to write the lyrics, and sing (in my head), our song of my graduating year, I recall with smiles on my face and a pride in my heart that my name may forever be written in the sands of time of my school and just like him, wherever all my classmates may be all over the world, I may have made an imprint in their heart – through my writing.

I recall how everything played out that day. Classmates were already aware that I could string words together, so when our music teacher said he wanted us to come up with something original, I raised my hand to try. The outcome was fantastic.Thinking back at this, I realized that I was and is still good with stringing words together and creating good content. However, I spent the best part of my years in high school feeling so timid and insecure. I lacked self assurance and belief in myself. I lived each day being miserable. Why was this?I focused all of my energy on my weaknesses. I was a complete dullard with Chemistry and this affected my self esteem.

My dullness was so thick, and well noticed that I recall the chemistry teacher coming to the exam hall on the day we wrote our final exams boasting that she’s aware that I’d never pass Chemistry. I recall her saying in the presence of everyone when she spotted me, called my name out and said, “Omobolanle Adeyemo. You can never pass Chemistry”. I was not shocked at her words, rather I swallowed it and accepted my fate. Well, she was right. I had a F9 in Chemistry. And I struggled to have credits in the rest of my other science subjects. Secondly, I was and is still thin. And because of this, I felt so miserable. I hardly had the curves that most teenagers had. With a sophisticated school like the one I attended, filled with several rich kids as well as our final year driven by the euphoria of having boyfriends, that heightened my insecurities. I felt I didn’t stand a chance to even be approached for friendship by any guy. I came across a post on Facebook and the question was asked was what was our regret and I mentioned there that I regretted wasting my teenage years and early twenties feeling so insecure because I felt I was thin, a size 6 or even 4.

More misery added to me were those who would constantly harass and made jest of my stature. As I type this, I remember this person who would always mention how thin I was and use me as yardstick for being thin. She’d say, “if a person is not as thin as Omoby, then you’re not yet thin”. This words would kill something inside of me. It would dampen my spirit and make me feel so terrible. At that time, I didn’t know how to dish back the same poison anyone gives me, so I’d suck it up, go and cry in my corner. I also didn’t know at that time that persons like that were only projecting their insecurities on me. During those years, I spent the best time of my life going through life focusing on my weaknesses rather than focusing on my strengths. I wasted time doing this and now I can’t get back those years back, I’m committed to living the rest of my years better.

I wish I focused on the other side, that I could write and even though I was not very smart with Chemistry, Maths and numbers, I am good with words and could string them together. I mean, if after several years, my old friend could remember that I was the one who composed our valedictory song, then I am actually super talented but I had made the mistake only focusing on the things I couldn’t do.I recall also that I had stories written in more than three or four higher educational books, which my classmates would read with many being shocked that I could write so well. I was a pro in poem writing and creating fiction. I recall how many of them would ask me to help them compose letters and poems to their boyfriends and girlfriends and how I would do this effortlessly. Yet, I had completely gone through that phase of life thinking that I was just a complete dullard, and being thin also added to my anguish.

Even though I can not take back the time, as I grow older and go into 2021, I’m now more committed to focusing on my strengths and leaving my weaknesses alone. I am not going to dwell on that. I often say I don’t know book, (with many disbelieving me), but I’m now retracting my statement to say I’m brilliant. I may be an idiot with numbers, but I’m awesome with words. I am incredible with putting content together. I am marvelous with writing epistles.

This is what my hubby always tells me when I admire his intelligence with numbers. “Omoby, you think I’m smart. But you’re intelligent yourself”, he would reassure me. “I can’t string words like you do. You do this effortlessly”.He’s right. A physical proof is my book, ALERO. This book which is over 600 pages in hardcover print is one I effortlessly wrote in three weeks. If I could do this, then I am not bad afterall. It means I’m not a dullard.Also, I may not be a size 10 or 12 like I have always wished, I’m going to be great being a size 6. I’m not going to wish anymore that I were fat. I am going to take pride in my stature. Fortunately unlike with my intelligence for words, I came to accept and love my stature earlier than now coming to accept that numbers is not my forte.

And this is the difference between successful and unsuccessful people. The former focuses all their energy on their strengths while the latter go through life just focusing on their weaknesses.Why am I sharing all of this with you?Please don’t be like me who wasted a tangible time of her young twenties and even mid twenties wishing she were thin.

Don’t be like me who squandered valuable time thinking I wasn’t smart, and who’s is now retracing my statement about not being intelligent thereby underestimating myself all along. Don’t be like me who thought I wasn’t clever because I wasn’t smart in numbers but forgets that with words, I do that effortlessly – including writing here on Facebook. Please focus on your strengths. Do this consciously. The person you admire whom you wish to be like is working hard at their strengths. Don’t compare yourself with anyone. If you do, you’re gonna compare your weaknesses with another’s strengths, making you go through life completely depressed.

Remember, there’s something amazing about you.
Find it and stay there.
Find it and find peace.


3 thoughts on “A story of how I have come through…

  1. Debs says:

    Thank you for sharing this, Omoby. While we may not be perfect, each human has his or her own strength and that you should focus on in becoming the best version of you.


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