MOCKERS HAVE BEEN PUT TO SHAME!

September 9, 2019. This date brings to my memory an experience looking back, I stand in awe of God. You know when I share stories of being mocked for being without children, some people think I cook up stories. So, see. This is one. Exactly a year ago on this day, while we were still dealing with the trauma of a miscarriage, trying to settle down in our new jobs and in a new country, the devil laid it in somebody’s heart to remember me. You know how we pray to God that our helpers should remember us ba… this one received an instruction from the devil for me.

This person yielded to their wicked desires and sent me this anonymous message (picture attached), all filled with hate, manipulation and vile. Reading this message again, I am given to believe that this may not exactly be about us being without children, It appears to be some deep seated envy/jealousy of me and my achievements. This person had and felt the only way to demean, mock or spite me was not having a child at that time. They probably wanted to use me to prove some silly points they’ve concorted in their heads about me being in misery, being unhappy, gloat, and make subs about me. I mean, what else could they use to shame me? I get job, I dey obodo oyinbo, I get man wey get sense…na pickin remain.This moron ensured that I read this message (by drawing my attention to it) and waited for me to read the message. The anonymous identity and deliberate attempt to hide the gender, proves it’s a well calculated attempt to hurt me.

A message crafted deliberately for pain. One deliberately carried to hide the identity (and gender too).Just as the sender intended, the message hurt me deeply. This is not something I’d be dishonest about. I doubted my truth and reality. I started to ask if there was something wrong with me. I started to ask if I was really a virgin when I got married or maybe my organs had been destroyed somewhere without my knowledge. I started to ask if I really got pregnant when we did. I questioned God several times. In everything, I am grateful for my sisters, few friends and my husband who held my hands all the way.

I cried buckets of tears. If there’s anything that has hurt me most in my entire existence, it’s this message. I was dealing with the trauma of a miscarriage, feelings of failure and helplessness, and somebody sends me this message. I was almost going mad with hurt. I couldn’t understand it. The only thing in my head that kept me sane was knowing we had been pregnant before – an information this moron was unaware of, and called me barren. For each tear that I shed, I cursed this person over and over again. I cursed this person in my pain and sorrow. I was like Hannah in the Bible who was mocked for being without a child.Hehehheeheh.But look at God o. Just a look at God. Two months after this message was sent, we got pregnant and exactly a year later, God gave us a son. Hahahahaha. Isn’t God good?❤️

To whoever you are: I’m posting this publicly because somehow I think you’ll get to see this. Who are you when God has not spoken? It’s even silly. I don’t understand it. What were you thinking when you sent me this? You forgot people intentionally decide when they wanna have children? What of if I was pregnant at the time you sent this message? Didn’t you think of that? What of if the issues you highlighted had nothing to do with me? But your dark heart and evil intention wouldn’t let you understand all that, neither would you realise that in a split second, God can turn things around for anyone. It just took my father a year. Nothing is indeed impossible with him.

You wrote me this in a cruel attempt to mock me whilst hiding your identity. You said I’ve hurt people yet in the same breath say I’m not one of those I’ve hurt. How manipulative?! If you had some guts, you should have come out boldly to say what beef you have with me. The general belief is that you expected me to gloat about my lack of children, be miserable, wear mourning clothes, even go offline, choose to discontinue living because of this. You watched out for when I’d make posts about being worried because we had no children. With each landslide I made, each milestone I achieved, each posts I made that proved to you I was genuinely living my best life now, you were bitter. I’m wondering why with all your hate and bitterness for me, you couldn’t come out boldly to send me this.

Why did you have to use an anonymous number to send me this? I’d have expected you to chest your bitterness for me and reveal who you are. Shows how despicable and wicked you are! A human who lacks conscience! But you see God…He has shamed you! You should hide your face in shame!

Whoever you are.

May your life continue to be miserable. May you never have any reason to rejoice.

May every good thing elude and be far from you.

You’ll suffer and live your life in agony. You’ll live the rest of your live in misery.

As you deliberately sent me this message to spite me, and cause me pain, same in greater measure, press down, running over shall be given unto you. Amen!I hope you seek repentance and genuinely repent (na, this is not because I want to know you), but because if you don’t, you’re gonna live the rest of your life in penury, lack and sorrow.

***

To any of you who deliberately mock others for what they don’t have. I hope you’ll learn from this. I know it’s hard to openly confess here if you’ve been guilty of this, but I hope that in your closet you’ll cry out in repentance, seek forgiveness from whoever you’ve hurt and sin no more. If you don’t, the same fate awaits you. I hope you’ll realize that you have absolutely no right to mock anyone for whatever they seem not to have. I hope you’ll understand that you do not have your own life in your hands. I hope you’ll realize that the person you’ve mocked today can be in a better position (than you) tomorrow.

Learn to be kind. It costs nothing from us. People fight battles everyday. Many of which are unknown to us, the best we can do is to be kind to them. ***

NB: Kindly walk past this message if you’re tempted to drop any kind of unsolicited sanctimonious of forgive and forget. I’d delete your message and block you!Until this person reveals his or her identity AND shows remorse or repentance TO ME, I’m not obligated to offer my forgiveness. I know God has shamed this person but it also gives me absolute joy to put this out, call this out, afterall Bible says we declare it to the wicked, it shall not be well with them. This person deserves no mercy from me.I have waited for a year to make this post.

When I received this message, I NEVER said a word to this person. It’s lifted off my chest now, so please, desist from telling me I shouldn’t have posted this. Or you expected more from me. Remember, I’m not your role model and I don’t operate with the standards you’ve created of me in your head. You’re also free to curse this person. Rain as many insults as you like. Humans like this are despicable and we shouldn’t spare them.

***Leaves the stage and sings …*Who has the final say? Jehova has the final say****

Finally, may I use my story to encourage every woman or man waiting for a child. Everyone who has suffered miscarriages or some sort of infertility issues, everyone battling with some pain, some grieve, or some battle on your inability to have children. Everyone who has been mocked and called all sort of names, jested at etc.I want to hug you and tell you that I can relate – maybe to a little extent but I understand your struggles. I understand the pain. ❤️

I use our son as a point of contact for you too. I pray that God answers you speedily and suddenly. May He give you your own testimony just like He did for us. May your mockers bow their heads in shame.***EDIT:

When you’re done reading this screenshot, know that THIS PERSON IS NOT A MAN. THE END OF THE MESSAGE IS A DELIBERATE ATTEMPT TO HIDE THE GENDER. It’s a DISTRACTION… you know…so that while I’m being careful with men around me, I wouldn’t know the real enemy is a woman. Men are hardly petty with issues like this. It’s women that often carry another woman’s inability to have children on her head, mocking her fellow woman. So while you curse out, please curse like you know this is a woman’s handiwork. We need the curses to be directed appropriately o. 😂

DO NOT STUMBLE INTO PARENTING

Many of us stumbled into parenting. Many of us would stumble into being parents. Many would continue the same parenting styles our parents used on us on as children. Asides from the fact that their way didn’t actually help us, some of us went on to hurt others, became damaged people, and we failed to address our inner issues.

We’ve been trained to seek violence, shouting and as the only way to resolve conflicts. If we look closely, even here on Facebook, many of us can’t have decent conversations with others insults or throwing jabs at each-other.

Some of us overlook this trends that should call our attention to a deeper and inner reflections of our flaws.

“I’m not a parent yet”, some reason.

And to those who are, rather than look within ourselves and make changes, we justify these ills with that part in the Bible that says “spare the rod and spoil the child”.

Yet, we still have a generation of broken people who have been blinded to think that physical assault and abuse are the only ways to resolve issues. We see men (and women) physically abuse their spouses and call it discipline. Isn’t why a man can boldly lift his hand and hit his own wife? We see women physically abuse their maids and say they’re training them. What of some of us who physically hit our children and claim it’s discipline – an action we can not carry out on animals are melted to our children and we think this is okay?

Some of us have been emotionally and psychologically hurt. Do we talk about the lack of self esteem because our parents verbally abused us? Many of us can’t stand up for ourselves and what we believe in, because we were never given the freedom to make our own choices in the homes we grew up in. Can we mention that many of us are still scared of public speaking because we were never trained to be bold, courageous by our parents? Do I have to mention that many people do not have a great relationship with their parents because we grew up in homes were friendship, openness and communication was never a priority?

If within you, you didn’t like your parents style of training you, and you really want to do better, you’ve to be deliberate about it with your children.

You can’t afford to just stumble into being a father or mother and expect that things would be business as usual or expect luck to take over. Somebody said, which I agree to, that the styles used by our parents of the last two generations can’t work with children of this generation. Additionally said by another, “You can’t put old wine in new skins”.

You’ve to read about parenting. Get good books that discuss the different personalities in children, study the psychology of your own child, know your child’s temperament etc.

I bought a parenting book sometime ago, including a book understanding children’s love languages and temperaments. Somebody asked me why I’d buy such books now after-all I don’t have children. I told her, I was making preparations for the day. If I’ve this free time, then I should not just expect to be a good parent by luck. I must prepare for that day. You don’t prepare a horse on the day it’s going for battle, preparation must have gone on months or years before the day.

The problem is that many people skip the preparation aspect. We desire the good things of life but don’t wanna prepare for it. We don’t wanna pay the price to study. Unfortunately, you don’t start learning about children when you’ve them, if you do desire children otherwise you’ll end up having damaged children.

It’s the same thing with marriage. Many people desire good spouses, but would never seek out knowledge on how to get one. They only pray for luck and hope that fate smiles on them. This is why when people say I’m lucky I’ve a good marriage, I don’t think so. I worked for it. I prepared for the kind of home I wanted, I didn’t stumble into this. I knew who I was and who I would never be able to live with. Maybe luck happens for some, well, I don’t believe in luck, I believe in preparing and being intentional about whatever you desire.

Therefore, if you wanna be a good parent, be intentional about this. Being married doesn’t qualify you as a good parent. If you’ve not unlearned the toxic parenting styles your parents had on you which you didn’t like, you have to start now while you’re still single or married without children. You’ve to do this consciously. Read up books.

Being a parent is much more than being a father or mother or providing for their physical needs. Procreation doesn’t make you a parent, it just makes you a biological mother or father. You’ve to make that thoughtful decision to care for, love your child. It is hard work.

You’ve to learn to hear them out, communicate with them, let know know they’ve got a friend in you. Protect their reputation and image. As a parent, it’s your responsibility to protect them from abusers, harm and evil. You should also protect them from yourself, your bad temper, anger and outburst.

Don’t be quick to make a post on social media about your children’s outburst or tantrums. Don’t be quick to ridicule and put your children down in public and call it discipline. You have to recognize that each child is different and cease comparing them with your other children. You’ve to learn to listen to them, and seek not to control them. You can’t afford to get your children to respect you by using violence and anger.

Children are humans too, who’ve feelings and are deserving of respect, and regard. Children act better when they are heard. Listen to them.

There are other ways to discipline a child that will bring out the best in them. Find them out. This is your sole responsibility if you wanna have children. You’ve can’t afford to just have children waiting for them to become your retirement plans if you’ve not done your own part of the work!

Do you see that parenting is such a hard task. It’s not something you should just stumble into if you wanna do things differently.

ALL RIGHTS RESERVED

The lack today could be the bounty tomorrow!

I had a classmate who was always brought out of school assembly for late payment of fees or no fees at all. Canned. Beaten. Made jest of. I would feel so sorry for her and worry about her parents. I was never close to her and couldn’t ask about them. I had my own struggles and just concentrated on my studies.

Few years later, I met her in my University. We became close. She looked frailer than we were in secondary school. She could hardly afford to pay her fees. Ours was a Federal university and our fees were relatively cheap, but she struggled year in, year out.

Sometimes, she would come perch in my room for a few weeks before she could sort out accommodation the University provided. She also did some side jobs; frying akara, selling extension weaves, laundry for her hostel mates and lecturers, running errands, cooking and all sorts.

While staying with me, she confessed that things had been tough for her parents since her father lost all his savings. Her mum had never been working as her father was responsible for all their financial needs.

They lost their house, they lost all they had, but for her father’s decision not to take she and her younger brother to a public secondary school, they’d have been forced to withdraw. They lived from hand to mouth and where I could help, I assisted her with money and foodstuff.

In our third year in school, after we returned from ASUU break, I never heard from her. All attempts to reach her on the number I had failed. I moved on and prayed for her anytime her thoughts came to mind.

Fast forward to few years later. Somebody messages me on Facebook asking if I remember her. She introduces herself and voila, it’s my old friend. We shared and talked. She told me how she eventually had to drop out of school because her father died and her mum followed shortly after.

Few months after her parent’s death, she received a call from one of her father’s old friend and classmate. He had been searching for her and her younger brother a long time upon hearing the death of his friend and wife. Her father had paid his fees when he was wealthy and was looking for them to say thank you, and help where he could. In his words, her father had been helped offset all his debts and it was only recipocatory to extend same help to his children, especially at a time they needed it.

Guess what?

This man sponsored she and her brother to study in the UK for their first and second degree. Afterwards, she got a job with a UK startup company and runs the Nigerian office. Her brother graduated tops in his class and he’s currently a basketballer.

When I was studying in the UK, we hooked up to meet and she had changed. She looked better. Everything she had gone through was in the past. The difference was really clear. Fresh. Sweet. Beautiful. She was oozing the good life.

I also visited her in Nigeria and she has done so well for herself. She drives her own car, lives in her own house in one of the highbrow estates in Abuja and runs a business on the side. She told me this is even a fragment of what she has. I was happy and amazed.

She shared a lot about the maltreatment she received from her parents’ relatives, the sufferings she and her brother went through and all sorts. Admist tears she said, “Omoby. Look at me. Remember when I used to come and beg you for garri and cubes of maggi. This is my house. I’m comfortable. I’m living my dreams. I’m happy. I’m content.”

We both cried and shared. She shared with me of how she was mocked and looked down upon, how people didn’t want to be her friend. How she was almost harassed by some of her dad’s friends when she went to them for help.

One thing I’m grateful for is that; I never looked down on her when she was at the bottom. I offered help where I could. I’m really happy to see how far she’s come. It’s almost unbelievable to realise that somebody in need yesterday is in plenty today.

My friend’s words were, “Omoby, if you ever need anything and I mean anything, please do not hesitate to tell me. You were there when we had nothing. I’d do my best to help wherever you need it”.

There’s one thing I would never do; to look down on anyone. The popular saying that no condition is permanent is really true.

A person who’s poor today may be in a better place tomorrow.

At that time, I didn’t help her because I wanted to get anything from her, I helped her because it was in my capacity to do. I had more and I could share. I lived in my own apartment in school and this was somebody who needed a place to stay. I’ve known too well not to look down on anyone; these are values my siblings and I grew up with.

In life, don’t you ever look down on anyone. The one who has nothing today could be in bounty tomorrow. And vice versa. Do not mock anyone of today’s lack. Tables could turn. That it’s a lack today doesn’t mean it would be same tomorrow or next. Or next year.

Please don’t look down on yourself either. If you have nothing today, this doesn’t mean you’ll not have it tomorrow. You shouldn’t give up on yourself. All it takes is God’s hand of favour to turn things around for you. And this could happen in a twinkle of an eye.

If you’re that person who makes jest of people’s lack because you have in bounty, you’ll be shocked when tables turn. If you think that it’s okay to mock a person’s sufferings or think that’s the end of their life, you’re very unwise.

What is it you have that the Lord hasn’t given you? Why would you make jest of another because they lack what you have? What would you take away from this world when you go? Nothing. Not your houses. Not your money. Not your gold. Not your investments. Not your accessories. Not your children. Nothing. You’ll leave empty.

Anytime I remember how life turned for my friend, I stand in awe of God and it has further reinforced my belief not to mock anyone for whatever they lack today.

Life is very unpredictable.

LADIES- DO NOT PUT YOUR LIFE ON HOLD FOR MARRIAGE

A single friend of mine started her relocation sometime last year and is now here in Canada. She started this route without waiting for marriage. She tells me men full ground and she wouldn’t wait for marriage before she does something tangible with her life.

I like her and I like how she knew she could actualize her relocation plans as a single person.

But this is not the mindset of the typical Nigerian lady.

A typical Nigeria lady is waiting to be married before she takes major life changing decisions of her life.

She is waiting to be married before she starts that degree or course she really want to.

She’s waiting to be married before she takes that concrete step to relocate or start a business or write that book, or launch that startup.

Somehow, she thinks being married would immediately launch them into her dreams. She believes marriage is a magic wand that would immediately jump-start her plans. She thinks marriage would solve all her problems, cater for all her needs and automatically puts her at the centre of their dreams.

She doesn’t know that in most cases, she can achieve more as a single person than being married, because the person whom she’s waiting for has the huge possibility to put her plans on hold.

I’d explain.

Marriage is a very good thing, but it also comes with loads of responsibilities. This responsibilities demand your time, resources and money.

Pregnancy is one phase in Marriage that adds responsibilities and delays your personal plans.

Child bearing is another.

This is why you may have heard many married women say, I wanted to go for that degree, I wanted to start that business, I wanted to go for that course, but I got pregnant, started raising kids and had to put everything on hold.

No, I’m not saying you can’t achieve your plan nor reach your peak being married, but you do it faster being single. This is because your focus is not divided and you’re running unilaterally with your goal solely in mind.

No, your partner doesn’t necessarily have to be a bad guy nor does it mean he is a dream killer, however remember, you’re bringing into existence another human who also has his own plans in his head. This fusion comes with sacrifices and changes that delay what you should have achieved if alone.

Dear single lady,

If you’re sure about what you wanna do, please don’t wait to be married before you start. Start immediately. Start now.

I have to mention this, not in any way to boast at all. Many of my friends who desired to go for their second degree and didn’t start while single, are yet to still do so being married. Those who did, struggled amidst very uncomfortable circumstances.

This is because marriage responsibilities delay personal plans. It’s a reality many know too late. Beyond the euphoria and glamour your wedding day brings, comes the reality that marriage brings sacrifices, many of which are painful and uncomfortable.

This is why I implore you to achieve all you desire to do being single. At least try. Do your bit. Do your best. Look back with contentment and be proud of yourself. There’s nothing like wishing you had done something earlier.

Don’t just wait for Mr right to come sweep you off your feet while you just do nothing. Start working on your own goals and purpose.

I was speaking to a friend yesterday who desires to relocate to Canada but is waiting to be married before she starts the process. I had to tell her that if this is what she wants to do, she should start immediately. Asides that applying as a single applicant is cheaper and quite straightforward, you just never know the kind of man you’ll get married to.

He doesn’t have to be a bad guy to put your own plans on hold. He may just not be ready to move at the time you want to. Perhaps, he may have businesses in Nigeria and doesn’t see the move at all, or he may be that guy who’s a snail in making decisions, doesn’t take risks, thereby truncating your plans; you therefore become a gunner.

Two of my close friends who wish to relocate have partners that are delaying them. No, they’re not bad men but they don’t just key into the opportunity.

One of them, her hubby likes the idea but he wouldn’t lift a finger. Unfortunately he’s the one with the higher qualification, therefore as to be the one at the forefront.

The other isn’t even interested at all. The thought of relocation irks him. In his mind, those who leave, go on to do odd jobs and barely survive.

This is why I told my other single friend, and I’m telling you too, please do what you have to do before you get married. Let that love meet you ahead.

Truth is, if this friends were single, they would be better for it. But their men wouldn’t allow them be great.

If a man wouldn’t put his plans on hold until he gets a wife, I don’t see why you should put your own plans on hold until you get a husband.

2019 is almost gone and I know many are waiting to be married before they become intentional about their lives. Please don’t. You may get married and realize this too late. I hope this post would help you have a rethink.

ALL RIGHTS RESERVED

BE CAREFUL!

Miss B is both an American citizen and a Nigerian citizen. She also holds a Canadian passport. She’s well travelled and has worked with several companies both in the US and Canada and came home to work in Nigeria.

One day, while having a cup of tea in the dinning hall of an hotel where I had a seminar, I overheard Miss B telling another young lady also attending the conference as I was, why she thinks relocating isn’t a good idea.

She started by saying that relocating is capital intensive and then people leave their “good lives” in Nigeria to pick up nonsense jobs here. She said moving from the unknown to the known isn’t a venture people should consider.

She also mentioned that this country isn’t has beautiful as people expect it to look because they’re met with the rude shock of trying to settle down, pay huge bills and even when they get good jobs, they’re highly taxed.

By the time she was done, I almost choked on my tea because she had just discouraged a young lady who wanted to make a critical decision in her life. She had just told a young lady who had plans of moving to a country that would give her the opportunity to maximize her potentials, she had killed such dreams, and of course coming from somebody who was even a citizen of the same country she wanted to go to, there were high chances this young lady was gonna take her word as gold.

Almost a year down the line, Miss B wants to do some project in Nigeria with another colleague. Government policies are not favourable. The peoples’ attitude towards her project isn’t also helping matters. Even though her project is one that would benefit the poor in the community, the locals are comfortable with living in penury and poverty. They don’t want a change, they don’t want anything that would take them away from their confort zones. Basic infrastructure facilities are unavailable. It’s frustrating, everything she puts into her project hits a concrete wall.

Miss B gives up and sighs. Ha! Is this a country, she asks. I can’t even get anything done. The people are sick and rigid in their old ways. Government policies are not favourable to us. Eventually, gathering her Canada passport, she returns back to one of her options and continues to live her life here.

When she gets here, she breathes a sigh of relief. First, she doesn’t have to battle with the epileptic power supply as she does in Nigeria, the Internet facility is better and she’s even breathing fresh and unpolluted air. Although, she pays taxes, she clearly sees where her taxes are going to.

What’s my point of this post?

At the tip of your fingers, I’m sure you can count the number of people Miss B may have met along her path whom she has discouraged on taking a second option. Unfortunately, Miss B would never go back to meet every one of them and tell them she had changed her mind and now thinks having a second option is good for everyone.

The young lady I overheard her making discussions with and discouraging her is one of such people whom she has sown such seeds to.

This is why I keep saying this and I’d not stop.

Be careful of those who tell you not to relocate but who have second options – people who hold dual citizenship to other countries. While they can pick up their passports and return to a saner environment, their second homes, you’re stuck with one option. Some of them got theirs through their parents who were wise enough to secure their childrens’ future while some went in search for it as adults. However they got theirs, what matters is that they’ve got a options and if Nigerian scatters today, they can pick their bags and move on. Can you?

My aunty is one of those people who fall into this category. She doesn’t see the need to relocate. She doesn’t understand why young people like myself and my husband don’t wanna stay and build Nigeria. I have made her to understand that I can’t build Nigeria. I don’t have the powers and position to do this and the people who can, have a different reality to mine. Unfortunately, she still doesn’t get it.

I have stopped trying to make her see my point. You see, as much as I respect and love my aunty, I would never listen to her advise.

Do you know why?

My aunty is a British citizen. Not just her, her husband, and all her children hold dual citizenship.

I come from a very privileged and educated home. I am one of those who have educated, well travelled and exposed grandparents and we grew up knowing we have families who live abroad- not some distant relatives.

My grandparents were citizens of the United Kingdom, lived and buried in the UK. My dad and his two immediate younger siblings were the only ones who were not born in the UK at the time my grandparents relocated in the early forties. But his other younger siblings, my aunty inclusive, were born in the UK and automatically got their citizenship.

While my dad’s other siblings legalized their own status, stayed and built their homes there, my dad returned back to Nigeria without legalizing his own status preventing us from ever becoming British citizens.

Now, my aunty, her husband and her kids, my cousins can decide they’re tired of Nigeria and go on a vacation to the UK without any bother. All they need to do is to pick their passports and fiam, they’re all gone. Sometimes I am unable to reach her or my uncle, her husband and I’m told they’re vacationing in the UK.

Being British citizens means you have access to 185 countries in the world, and only 33 counties do they need a visa in advance. What this means is that with a UK passport, you hold stake to a country that ranks the fifth global powerful passport in the world.

Let me shock you that Nigeria ranks 84th in the world and this means that you can only access 45 free counties and trust me, 99% of this counties are nothing to write home about; more or less suffering the same misery as their big brother, Nigeria suffers, or even worse.

This is why I’d never listen to my aunty. What option do I have? I’m just as stuck as dead. I can do nothing. Thank God this is all past. I now have a second option.

I don’t know why I’m sharing this, but if you’ve got somebody whom you’ve told about your relocation plans and the person doesn’t want you going or tries to talk you out of it just like Miss B did to that young lady, perhaps you need me to speak to you.

Oh my! I have carried this unpatriotism on my head and I’d tell you a hundred and one reasons why you should give yourself a second option. Maybe not for you, but please do it for your kids. Give them the opportunity to be able to work, live, study anywhere in the world.

Perhaps you need to also check what status this person holds. I love my aunty, and she knows I love her, but I’d never heed her advise. I have gone to get myself a second option, so that when I am sixty like she is, I’d be able to look back at my life, look at the choices and decisions I have made, be proud of them, knowing I didn’t lose an opportunity when it was open.

Not just that, my children would be eternally grateful for the opportunity I gave them. I do not want them asking me what I was doing when this opportunity was open. May I not live this world without securing the future of my children.

Do you agree?

The 8 Categories of People you should be wary of when deciding whether to relocate or not.

I attended a training sometime ago in Lagos. During the break session, we all went to have lunch at the dinning room.

Unfortunately, my laptop was having issues and I could not enjoy the meal as much as I would have loved to. While I was having a hard time trying to understand what could be wrong, something else caught my attention that made me put my worries on hold.

One of the facilitators of the training and a female staff were both having discussion and the crux of their discussion got my ears on alert. You know, anywhere I hear “relocation”, my ears are always at attention. I just want to know your thoughts and judge your patriotism😆. If you are having a hard time making a decision, I am very kind to let you into my inner room, make you know about my plans and encourage you. On the other hand, if you badmouth relocating, I keep my mouth shut and just move away.

So this day, I put my worries away and listened. The man was worried about the challenges of relocating. He is an experienced professional in his field and had heard lots of sour stories about those who come here to work menial jobs. He desired a second chance for his family but was really confused.

Perhaps this are your fears too.

The lady he was talking to, apparently hoping she would be able to calm his fears, stated by confirming the stories he heard and how it is true people do menial jobs. She said she knew many professionals who have left their high flying jobs in Nigeria to take up silly jobs here. She went further to say that this country is not as beautiful as others claim to be. Everybody is taxed, life is really hard and how many people are in serious debts. In fact, she even knew one or two who died from terminal diseases here, she knew people who were depressed because of the private culture lived here. She went further to tell him not to relocate because ‘home’, which she meant as Nigeria would always be home.

When I heard “home”, you know like the lines many patriotic Nigerians use, I knew I wanted to know her thoughts on this. True to my curiosity, the facilitator was also interested in same and inquired further.

“Home? But home is where you make home, isn’t it?”. He said curiously.

She went on to say that Nigerians living here are depressed, missing their families and many of them still return back to their homes after everything. She told him she did not understand why he wants to start all over again in a place several others are retiring to go to. It was just safer to stay.

Lunch was now over and we had to go back to class.

I kept all I had heard inside me, set it aside in my brain to accommodate lessons for my training.

After the session, I met the facilitator and told him I needed to speak with him. I confessed and apologized for eavesdropping on his conversation earlier in the day but I heard everything and I wanted him to take the lady’s opinion with a pinch of salt. 😂🤣

He was surprised. His eyes shone in shock. He didn’t expect this.

He asked why. I told him I am getting a second option and as we speak, my application is in process. I told him everyone’s reality is different and all she said does not have to be his. I told him it is true there would be initial teething challenges, but nothing can be compared to living a better life here.

Then I inquired about this lady.

She had spent all her life living here. Infact, she is a citizen of Canada.
She has previous work experience in some big companies in Canada and America.
She returned back to Nigeria, got a job with a top international company in Lagos and earns seven digits monthly.

She has two options. She is both a Canadian and a Nigerian. If Nigeria scatters today, babe would pick her bag and move without a bother.

She is privileged. She enjoys the benefits of both countries; Nigerian and Canada (even though I do not get to see what benefit I enjoy as a Nigerian)😐🙄.

I told him this and I would tell you too.

1. Be careful of those who tell you not to leave. Some of them have made money in their prime, fed fat, enjoyed the benefit of a developed country and just wanna retire back to Nigeria.

The same reason they left for a country that gave them the opportunity to maximise their potentials, and wanna retire back to Nigeria is the same reason you should think of going to a country that enables you to maximize your potentials while still in your prime so that someday, you’ll retire successfully too.

2. Be careful of people who already hold dual citizenship and tell you not to relocate. They have two options. If a war is declared in Nigeria tomorrow, they are safe while you are not. The Canadian or American government would secure them. You think Buhari knows you? Better use your own head.😜🤣

3. I have seen posts of those advocating “home is home’, “I love Nigeria”, “I die in Nigeria”…come to my inbox ask me how to relocate. Know that many people are closest hypocrites. They secretly spend millions to have their kids abroad, all their children school abroad, yet tell you not to relocate. The culture in Nigeria encourages people to hide information from others. They’d never let you know what they do. Never think that the person who chants “I love my country, Nigeria” , “Nigeria would be great again” isn’t doing something to better themselves. It’s their way of hiding the truth from you. I have signed an oath of confidentiality since I started this ministry, you for see proof yourself.🤐🙄

4. Reality is that some people are very uncomfortable with taking risks. They are not bad people. They are just those who would just do nothing even if you bring a pen to them to sign their citizenship. They seem very comfortable in their comfort zone and can’t imagine doing anything that takes them out out of it. If you allow their unbothered attitude to decide your fate, who is open to taking risks, you are on your own. Na you go wear your shoe. Na you the shoe go pinch.

5. This category are quite special. They’ve tried to relocate and failed. They have accepted their fate and even believed that the ‘miracle door of the abroad’ is forever closed on them, that their destiny and the abroad aren’t compatible, two parallel lines that can never meet. Thus, they’ve come up with the illusion that Nigeria is working for them. Maybe it is, maybe it is not, but what they are really trying to do is to console themselves in their own misery. Somehow, because they have tried something and failed, they look for ways to justify their sorrows. While I sympathize with them, please be careful of this kind of people. Don’t let them rub their misery on you. Be extremely discerning.

6. Some other people just wanna come here on holidays and return back. They have stakes in government. They have good business ties. They are making millions maybe even billions in naira. They have secured jobs. Life seems good. They have enough money to live a comfortable life in Nigeria, be their own local, state and federal government. You wey get great potential, age dey your side but no get money to even buy data, dey listen to them…continu.🤣

7. I really like this kind of people. Many religious sanctimonious Nigerians sit pretty on this table. This lots believe that God must come down from heaven and appear to them in a vision before they take this step. They would use the Bible to manipulate others into thinking God would never forgive you for relocating…and immediately you get here, God has closed his door of provision over your life.

They say you must fast and wait upon the Lord for forty days and nights in order to hear something like, “Omoby, my beloved daughter. I have made the land of Nigeria flowing with milk and honey for you. Your fate and destiny is in Nigeria. You are not going to make breakthrough anywhere else”… you know…that kind of response that comes in a vision, a large cloud, accompanied by angel Michael and Gabriel and all the 24 elders.

While it is true that God speaks to us in several ways concerning certain decisions of our lives, remember, God is also everywhere and He can bless you anywhere. He’d hold nothing against you. He knows you’re genuinely trying to survive in this world. Also, you are your own sign and voice. God would never come down to tell you to relocate or stay. You make the choice. You determine the path of your life. Your destiny is in your own hands.

8. The last category. They’re people who have never been dealt with the hard blow of the Nigerian system and may never be. They’ve not had a close relative, friend or family member who died from an unavoidable cause in Nigeria. Unlike Desmond Elliot and some people I know, they don’t have children with special needs. Nobody they know has died due to the decayed Nigerian health system, dearth of infrastructure facilities or reckless shooting of a police official, hence its impossible for them to relate. They’re not very rich, yet not poor, but haven’t had that experience that reveals to them how rotten the Nigerian system is; that close shave of death. Life seems to be just fair with them. If you allow them decide your fate, you who Nigeria has shown pepper, na una sabi o.

***
Need I mention that my facilitator I talked to, keyed into this vision, has since been recruited into our association; Association of Unpatriotic Nigerians Living in Diaspora (AUNLID) and he and his family are super grateful to me that I was very open with him about my plans. He tells me that I’m a different kind because the norm is for people to hide what they do from others. I am aware that this is what makes me different. 😍

The seed of faith I planted in him has germinated more fruits as he has gone on to recruit more people.

Please don’t me wrong. This post ONLY refers to those who desire second options. It its okay if you wanna stay and build the Nigeria of your dreams. I just hope this would happen in your lifetime. We wey no get faith and time don commot.

***

RELOCATING…an option you wanna consider???…PLEASE HELP RETWEET ON TWITTER! Yes

Hello guys!! How have you all been? Hope everyone is doing great and we are getting on with our relocation plans just fine? Thank you for all the positive feedback on my relocation post. If you are just seeing this post and you have not see that yet, I think you should head over there and do so. Trust me, you will love it! Check it here to read it.

Oh dear! I’m super excited. I’m happy that the relocation post has got many people taking actions for their lives and children.

When I started the relocation post on my blog, I didn’t really expect that it would go as much length as it did. I just wanted to have something to give to people when they ask me how I relocated because I couldn’t be responding to every single question on relocation. It gets overwhelming and the time difference between here doesn’t make it easy.

I started, stopped and on and off I went. When I thought I was done, I sent it to my friend, Denike and she said it was really good, but I could include pictures so as to rest people eyes. She also suggested I divide the post into parts. I decided to tell a story with the pictures and that’s why each picture came with a caption which you would enjoy as you read my post.

But what’s most amazing for me is that the post is doing many of my very patriotic friends strong thing. This is really amazing. I didn’t make the post to manipulate anyone or berate anyone for their choice of staying and this is why I kept emphasizing in the post that I’m aware that not everyone can leave Nigeria, unfortunately. If you do decided to stay, please this is fine. The post is for those who choose to relocate.

Here is the sweet jist.

So a friend tells me that her hubby who is so patriotic in the things of the Nigeria saw the post and read it. He follows me here and he likes me so the post got him interested.

Prior to this time, she said she had been talking to him about getting second options but nothing was working. She said they had not read too far in the post when her hubby declared. “Babe! We’re getting our passports done!”

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…the way I smile when my “patriotic” Nigerian friends become unpatriotic as a result of my “how to relocate out of Nigeria” post. The post is doing many people strong thing faaaa🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣.

She said they’ve gone for capturing and waiting for collection. She’s happy that atleast this is the first step to a dream come true and of course it is.

Another friend whom hubby and I talked to about relocating kept saying they only desire to just visit. On reading my post, oh boy! They’re having second thoughts about their earlier position. It really starts like that. My prayer is that many more people would read the post and have second thoughts.

Now for me, this are few of the amazing testimonies I have received from the post. I’m glad it is doing people strong thing and Nigerians are opening their eyes to the reality on ground.

I’ve been receiving tons of questions in my inbox and mail. If I haven’t answered yours, please hold on a bit.

I’ve posted the relocation link on Twitter. Please if you’re on Twitter, 👇 is the link.

Please kindly help me RETWEET this post and SHARE so that others can RETWEET too. This is the only favor I need from you.🙏

My handle is @adexomoby.

https://twitter.com/adexomoby/status/1134019406453989376…

Thank you very much and may God make all your dreams come true.

Please kindly return the favor by following my blog here and following me on IG here.

If you have any questions or comments for me, please drop me a comment here or use the contact form here. I would be happy to read from you.

Thank you guys and wishing you success and favor as you make your big plan.

Stop dating entitled men!

My parents sponsored my degree to the UK. They had paid all my bills, including accommodation and school fees. I can recall my aunty travelling to the UK, to my school, for my sake because she wanted to look for the best accommodation for me. When she did, my parents sent her the money and paid for the duration of my study.

All I needed to do was to go to school and study. Even though they promised me monthly upkeep, I looked for student jobs because I wanted to live off them and just make my own money. While my friends were looking for jobs to pay their accommodation fees, I was looking for jobs because I wanted to be independent and save some good money.

I can NOT imagine telling Daddy or Mummy say na boy I wan follow marry say I no dey go school again. Where is the mouth I would tell them say one boy has vouched never to marry me because I wan go further my education. On top their own money?! For an ordinary and mere boyfriend?!

No, you are just dead!

Hahhahaa, I trust my sisters sha. By the time, Onikepe slaps me from the left ear and Tolulope slaps me from the right, all the love that is shaking me would fly out of my head. Even my younger brother, Bobosticka would say, “sister Omoby, ahn..ahn…e be like say something dey craze for your head o”.

On a serious note, what sort of man says you should consider your five year relationship over because your father decides to sponsor your degree to Canada which you desire to go for.

Who raised this kind of entitled men? Who gave birth to such silly men? Who are their fathers? Men who think that a woman should dump her dreams and careers because she’s dating you. Are you serious? Because you’re who?

Why do many women think that their lives are over if they call the bluff of this kind of idiots. And to know that it is always women who put their careers and lives on hold for men who give silly conditions. Na women dey always ask this kain mumu question. Worse, for a man you’re not even married to. Tueh!

Let’s turn the tables and see.

A man may do a lot for a lady, the one he loves, but I am yet to see a man who would sacrifice his own career or dreams for a woman. Maybe there are, but I have not met any yet. Or a man whom the babe would threaten with such ultimatum and the man would come inbox to seek public opinion.

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I repeat, no man would put his life on hold to accommodate such entitled condition from any woman, even if it the woman he loves.
I am yet to see a man who would withhold a scholarship opportunity, a job offer, or something in such like just to be with the woman of his dreams. Heheheh.

He would rather go and the woman waits for him. So if a man would not do the same for you, you think you are obligated to do same for him to? Why? Because men are scarce? Because he’s the only one on earth for you? Because if you don’t marry him, you’re doomed?

A woman would be the one torn between choosing her career and a silly guy who gives such stupid condition. A woman is often the one having sleepless nights because she wants to hold on to a man who makes her choose between her career and a stupid love. A woman would put her career on hold, refuse scholarship opportunities, sacrifice her school fees because she loves a man without using her head well.

Ladies, I do not care how many years you have spent with a man, I do not care if his dick is gold plaited and or he is the best thing after sliced bread. See, immediately he mentions “c” without even spelling out the word “Choose”, let that relationship go. He’s not the only man on earth for you.

Also, this is a red flag that has the potentials of turning into something big in future. This means that if you do get married to him, he would stop you from advancing in your career. He would stop you from getting promotions, he would stop you from doing anything that makes you happy.

And trust me, at this time, because you have already given him the permission while dating, you may never be able to stand up for yourself. This is how women get married to men who suppress their dreams and progress, leaving them miserable and unhappy for the rest of their lives. Ask women who are miserable in their marriages, they’d tell you this are the signs they saw, ignored and didn’t pay attention to.

Stop making silly sacrifices for a man who does not love you, who makes you choose between your career and a relationship, because a man who makes you choose DOES NOT love you. Period.

This should not even be debatable. It should be the fundamental principle of every girl should stand by. But no! “I want to marry, I want to bear Mrs, Men are scarce” wouldn’t let some of you be great!

~ Omoby, 2019

RELOCATING TO CANADA by Omobolanle Adeyemo.

Hi guys! If you are reading this, I must congratulate on been one of the few who wish to take their destinies in their hands. I am positive you will not regret this decision. I would suggest that you do not read this in a hurry. Relax and let me take you on a journey that has the potential to change your life for good.

PART ONE

REASONS TO GET A SECOND OPTION

You see, I am very passionate about people taking their future in their hands. Right from childhood, I am known to be that person who makes deliberate decisions. I choose my choices and I live with all the consequences – good or bad. I am very intentional with living my best life now, and that’s because I know that I do not have all day. Just like you and I, we are closer to our graves everyday whether we face this reality or not.

Those who know me are aware I am not a patriot for Nigeria and I am not sorry about this. As a matter of fact,  I wear this tag proudly. Do not get me wrong, I love Nigeria, but I would not continue to live in a place if I can not get the best of that place – a country that discourages me from living my best life.  For me, there is no reward whatsoever for dying a martyr in Nigeria. When we leave this world, we’re not going to have a mark of Nigeria on our foreheads and given a crown for living or dying in Nigeria. As a matter of fact, one of the basic characteristic of human is MOVEMENT. We are not supposed to be static as trees, but move to places where we can thrive and grow. God’ll not hold your relocation move against you. He understands you’re basically trying to survive in this fallen world.

The fact that many Nigerian politicians and many Nigerian billionaires send their children abroad should be enough proof to tell you that Nigeria holds no future for nobody, except the few rich ones. It should also tell you that people are always on the look out to better their lives. If we would all be sincere with ourselves, Nigeria is currently a BIG MESS, it therefore becomes imperative that people look for opportunities and seek greener pastures anywhere else they think or know they can thrive. Some of the reasons why people look for opportunities out of Nigeria is really beyond money but the quality of life, available basic amenities, availability of a good and working health system, which is derived from living in a sane country – you know, a country that really works.

This is Canada- Beautiful right?! Location: Ontario, Canada.

I am currently on a mission to get as many people as possible to start thinking about giving themselves and their children second option aides Nigeria. I often ask people this and I’d ask you, “Can you beat your chest and categorically say that if you die today, your children can get the best of life in Nigeria?” If no, then this is why you should get thinking.

If you will take nothing else form reading this, take away the reality that Nigeria holds no future for you (and your children) and it is perfectly okay to let go of a country that kills your dreams. Don’t feel guilty about this…and do not let anyone make you feel guilty about this. Own your choices with your chest and do what’s best for you and your family.

Even, politicians are not playing. 

At the top of your fingers, I’m sure you know several politicians, some of which could be your relative or family who though are lawmakers in Nigeria don’t have their children studying or living there. I’m sure you know that many of them are dual citizens, including all members of their families.

Sometime in 2017, rumors had it that Nollywood actor and lawmaker, Desmond Olushola Elliott was spotted writing the English proficiency exam, IELTS for Canada Immigration. As a matter of fact, a close friend told me she saw him with her own two eyes. Shocking right?

Desmond Elliott, was brought on national TV, I think it was Channels TV (not sure now) and asked the same question by the interviewer.

He didn’t deny the rumors. He said this, paraphrased. “It’s true. I didn’t create the problems of Nigeria. Nigeria’s problem had always been there even before I came into politics”.

He went on to explain how one of his children is a special needs child (I can’t remember what exactly), and how he has spent millions of naira trying all he could to give the child the best medical care in Nigeria.

He explained that despite the money he has spent, he couldn’t get the best help in Nigeria. He flew the child to South Africa and although gets close to the best healthcare, it gulps a large chunk of his income.

He decided to pursue another option for his family because once his children become permanent resident or citizens of Canada, medical care is absolutely free.

This got me thinking.

1. Desmond despite being a lawmaker knows that Nigeria’s problem didn’t start today. So, you think you can solve Nigeria problem by staying? You think you’re Nigeria’s Messiah? The one called to save her from her ruins? The people who stayed, tried to savage Nigeria and even died for her, where are they today? You tell me.

2. He’s not more patriotic as you are who really doesn’t have the power to change anything. What laws can you create? What law enforcement actions can you take to benefit the common man?

The people who can, your politicians, who should make laws and can pass bills to better the lot of the common man have a different reality and don’t care about you. They’ve secured their own future. All their children and grandchildren till their entire generation hold dual citizenship. They don’t even know you exist. This should make you start thinking of yourself (and your kids too). At this point, it is okay to be very selfish.

3. Recently, I went for a CT scan of my brain because I had been having recurring migraines. All I needed to do was to go to the emergency section of any hospital close to me, present my health card and everything was carried out free of charge. I paid nothing. I know how much this scan cost and I know how many hospitals in Nigeria have the facility to carry this out. I also know how accessible this facility is for the common man.

All it takes is for your child or somebody close to you to suffer a terminal illness before you realize that Nigeria doesn’t love you. Sadly, you’re just a thin line between life and death when critically ill in Nigeria. The Nigerian government has not even done as little to subsidize healthcare and as a matter of fact, there’s still a lack of trust with the health facilities and Nigeria’s healthcare professionals. Where does this leave us? What happens if you suffer a terminal illness today? God forbid, right? The people who did, were not less than you.

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Pre- wedding picture. I think I was generally excited about life and more, hubby had assured me that immediately we settle down, we’d start making preparations for our big move. Location: Lagos, Nigeria

4. Desmond is a lawmaker. I’m tilted to believe that he knows some secrets about Nigeria politics which you a mere Nigerian isn’t privy to. Despite, he chooses to pursue a second option regardless of whatever people would think. See, people ALWAYS put themselves first. Desmond put his family first not even the constituency he oversees. This should tell you something.

5. Desmond wouldn’t allow Nigeria kill his child. He knows Nigeria kills. He knows Nigeria swallows her own. Nigeria sucks up good minds, he decides to do something about his own fate.

May I ask you, how more patriotic than Desmond can you be?

One thing I always say is this, if you love your country so much, or you’re the one specially called to save Nigeria, why not get the option and return back to Nigeria? Your Nigerian citizenship is still yours. Let’s thank God that Buhari hasn’t changed this yet, unlike its done in India.

I’m aware some people retain their jobs, and still hold on to their permanent residency status in Canada. This just only means that the required number of days you’re supposed to have to change your status to a citizen is prolonged.

Some people also go through all this process, stay the required 1095 days and after getting their permanent resident status, apply for citizenship, get that and return back to Nigeria. That’s fair and reasonable.

Yet, some people would still ask, “if we all leave Nigeria, what happens?”

According to the World Population Census, Nigeria is over 200m in population. This means that Nigeria doesn’t end with your family or your community neither does she end with all your town people. Nigeria is a million times bigger than all the people you know have relocated and a hundred million times bigger than all the people who would ever relocate in the future.

If 10m Nigerians leave or even 50m Nigerians leave, Nigeria wouldn’t feel it. It does nothing on the economy. The “powers that be” don’t even know you exist. How do I know? Let’s face it. If you die today, Nigeria would forget you. If you doubt this, recall the number of heroes who laid their lives for Nigeria that we do not honor today.

Furthermore, a sad reality is still that many people wouldn’t leave. You know… there’s no way on earth 200m Nigerians would relocate. The people who wouldn’t leave for reasons best known to them, and who still believe in Nigeria, can stay and build Nigeria. Why don’t you face yourself and what concerns you. Leave Nigeria to sort out her problems.

Do you know that statistics and figures show that the remittance that those living abroad send to Nigeria is more than what Nigeria makes as profit on crude oil.

In 2018, a total of $25.08 billion was remitted by Nigerians in diaspora into the country, according to PriceWaterhouseCoopers (PwC) estimates. This represents about 14% increase from 2017 and 83% of the federal government’s 2018 budget in value.

This is almost $3 billion higher than the World Bank’s previous estimate which, at $22 billion, placed Nigeria with the highest remittance in-flow in Africa and fifth-highest globally, behind the likes of India, China, Philippines and Mexico in that order.

This means that it’s not “your staying in Nigeria” that actually builds Nigeria, it’s we abroad that do the real building.

Please don’t dull themselves. Get out of that country as fast as you can and IF you can.

I have gone the extra mile to write this process for you, explain the how in detail because I care about you and your future. I want to share with you everything that made it possible for me. I hope you will take advantage of this.

PS: I keep using the conditional statement, IF, here because I am aware that a lot of us can not leave Nigeria, unfortunately, for genuine reasons beyond our control. If you are in this category, but you do wanna leave, I deeply sympathize with your situation. You’re the reason why I still want Nigeria to get better.

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It was my graduation day here. I looked forward to the future. This degree was a significant milestone in my life. Location: Sheffield, UK

Let’s talk about me and why I’m so passionate about getting a second option.

I would give you brief about myself…and why I’m concerned about my future. Why I dey carry this relocation matter for my head. 

I come from a very privileged and educated background. My parents are well educated and rose to the peak of their respective careers. My maternal and paternal grandparents were very educated and very comfortable. My maternal grandmother was a certified administrator while my maternal grandfather was a chartered accountant, one of the forerunners of those who started ICAN (Institute of Chartered Accountant of Nigeria) in Nigeria. He was also the president of ICAN and sat on several boards in Nigeria before his death.

To my father’s side of my extended family, my paternal grandmother was a registered nurse, while my paternal grandfather was a registered teacher who rose to become a school principal in the UK.

My paternal grandparents relocated to the UK from Nigeria in the early forties, lived all their lives in the UK and were buried there. They were both British citizens. Their children, my uncles and aunties, including my dad, studied and lived their lives in the UK. My dad is a medical doctor, studied and lived in the UK for about 25 years or maybe less. While my dad’s siblings stayed back and built their lives in England, my dad returned to Nigeria in the early eighties.

According to him, he did not like the cold weather and Nigeria was really a country of envy, as such there was no reason to stay behind. On his return, he got a good job, got married to my mum and never went back. He also never legalized his papers as a British…thus preventing us from having any legal ties with the United Kingdom.

As a child and even up till adulthood, I saw how humiliating it was applying for visa to the UK when all my cousins could travel without a bother. Sometimes, we would have to request for supporting documents from them. Though, this was never denied from us, but it was always sad and many times inconvenient on both sides. There was always this silent thought of “I wish we did not have to do this. Oh Dad, why? Why didn’t you legalize your status na?”.

Till date, my cousins can pick their bags and travel at will. I can not. I paid fees for an international student while studying in the UK. It was a lot of money. I was at the peak of getting a job offer with an international company but was denied after passing all their interview stages because I did not have the permit to work in the UK.

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My cousins and I. Can you guess where I am? I am on the far left- the only one wearing glasses. Location: London, UK 

I came back to Nigeria and I never used my foreign certificate to get any thing good. I was still earning peanuts in Nigeria. My cousins all had good jobs. They could get fantastic offers from foreign employers because they all hold dual citizenship. I could not even stand a chance in an interview. One day, somebody encouraged me to put in my application for Transport for London. I did. Hoping for a miracle. I was not shortlisted even though I was told I was good for the role. Why? I was a Nigerian citizenship with no ties to any other country.

This are some of the personal reasons I faced, which my husband and I decided that we would not allow our children suffer same.

Although my dad says Nigeria was better in the eighties and nobody knew Nigeria would deteriorate this much, it still would not have hurt if he legalized his papers just to give us options. “At least do it for your children” is what I tell everyone!

Sadly, this is still Nigeria in 2019 worse than it was in the 80’s.

Fact: Nigeria has even deteriorated over the years.

If you think this is false, ask your parents who were young adults in the 80’s and let them tell you how Nigeria has decayed over the years. Nigeria is still one where corruption is a lifestyle. Standard tertiary education is a fantasy. Hospitals and medical centers are death zones. Infrastructure facilities are nothing to write home about. Freedom of fundamental human rights can’t be fully expressed without harassment from some sect of people. Nigeria is a country where having interrupted power supply is a luxury enjoyed only by very few rich and privileged Nigerians.

Need I tell you that Nigeria is now the global headquarters of poverty. Insecurity issues abound and you as an average Nigerian is only a sickness away from becoming a social media beggar because there are no standardized health care systems available.

I could go on and on…

Today in 2019, Nigeria is even worse off!!

This is why I would not take chances.

I would give my children OPTIONS. The one I did not have. I would give them the opportunity to be able to work anywhere in the world, access the best medical care,  go to the best schools and move around the world easily as a Canadian citizen.

Note: While I advocate that people should have second options, I would never berate anyone who does not desire or who is not interested in relocating. As a matter of fact, we all can not leave Nigeria – a sad reality which saddens me each time I remember. For many people, reasons beyond their control would not make their relocation plans possible despite all the information at their finger tips, such as age, lack of education or required number of experience, financial constraints,  as well as having strong ties in Nigeria are genuine reasons to stay back.

However, if you are in the category who hopes that things would still get better in Nigeria despite being eligible to relocate, I genuinely salute your faith and hope. I encourage you to keep this faith alive. Please continue fueling your faith and keep building the Nigeria of your dreams. Let’s just pray that you get to see this happen in your lifetime.

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My look when I hear say you no wan get second option, lol. Location: Lagos, Nigeria

On the other hand,

If you are like me who wants to take her destiny in her own hands…

If you are educated and looking for a legal way to move yourself or your family to Canada to take a chance at a new path…

If you want your kids to have options…

If you want them to be able to move around the world easily…

If you want to be a passport holder of one of the best countries in the world with a global passport power rank of 5…

THEN LETS GO ON THIS RIDE!

Please note that there are many reliable agents who charge a hefty fee to help you through the process. They do not do the major work for you but only guide you. Some charge you for this information I am sharing for free. A friend messaged me and said she got this information for as much as 450K. This is to tell you that many other people would not give you what I am sharing for absolutely nothing. While some would ask you for nothing, many would hoard and never be wiling to share. Please hold this information like your life ticket. It is gold. Do not take it for granted.

In similar vein, me thinks you can complete the process on your own from the very beginning to end. My husband and I completed the process ourselves. All it takes is reading thoroughly and going through each details step after the other which I have outlined here. If you are one who is not given to details, lacks patience and does know how to follow simple instructions, you may find it difficult to cope here. My thoughts are the agent fees can be used for other things, however, if you have this extra money, please go ahead!

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My paternal granddad and I. I am told, I am the one who is his carbon copy. I think this is true. Because of a decision he and grandmom took, my cousins, my aunties and uncles (and their entire generation), hold dual citizenships. Location: London, UK

So, let’s get started in Part two!

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PART TWO

SAVING FOR YOUR RELOCATION DREAMS

Before I start, I want you to take a good look at this picture below. Take five mintues to study this.

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A rough estimate of the total sum for relocation according to your family size. Please study the different categories for your own family size. Picture Credit: Unknown. 

Guys, please be not deceived! Relocation is capital intensive and gulps a lot of money from the first day you start till the very end.

The picture above gives a rough estimate of the total amount you will need all through the process according to your various family size.

In Part Three, I would break down each of this process with their corresponding costs. For this part, let’s just talk about this rough estimate and how to save for this venture.

If you would look through the columns in the picture, you will see headings called Family size 1, 2, 3 and on. Let’s take the first column for example, i.e, the family size of one. This means a single applicant, i.e a single man, a single woman, or anyone without children or dependents. To left column is the heading titled, “Documentation”. This means every preparation or paper work needed from start to finish for this venture.

According to the picture, each documentation totals up to  N671,900K for a family size of one. What this means is that to go through this process as a single applicant, you will spend this particular amount, or close to it. Now, you do not have to have 700K saved somewhere before you start, I would advise that you start as soon as you can get any substantial amount.

Few rows down the documentation column is an heading called the ‘Total Cost’ and beneath that is an heading called “POF in CAD” = 12,474.00. This means that you will need to show a proof of funds to the sum of twelve thousand, four hundred and seventy four thousand Canadian dollars which is equivalent to N3,742, 200.00 (Three million, seven hundred and forty two thousand, two hundred naira).

The Canadian government is saying that if you are a single applicant, you should have this amount in your account to show that you can takecare of yourself pending when you get a job, settle all documentation in Canada in order to start getting government benefits or start earning.

Need I mention that to get the total estimate of your family size, you’ll need to add the total cost of application plus your POF.

ACCORDING TO THE PICTURE, FOR A FAMILY SIZE OF FOUR

Total cost of application: N1,318,400.00

POF: N6,954,300.00

Therefore, the rough Estimate for Relocation for a family of four: N8,272,700 00.

***Now, do the rough estimate for your own family size***

Did you notice that both the “Total cost” (Application Cost) and “POF” increases as family sizes increases. This is because the amount of money required to sustain a single person (family size of one) would not be the same to feed a man and his wife, a woman and her husband, a mother and her son, a father and his daughter, i.e a family size of two. Likewise, the amount to sustain a family size of two would never be able to sustain a family size of three and on. This is why as your family size increases, the POF also increases.

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We had just gotten married here, and I was super excited about spending life with this man! Location: Ibadan, Nigeria

The good news is that you do not have to have this money staked somewhere to show as proof of funds. What matters is that you have the money in your account for a period of six months and whatever way you get the money, if you are borrowing it, you are comfortable with your lender’s terms and conditions. You can also have this money in investments, credits and properties.

If you have plans of relocating, I would advise you start saving now. Start saving right away! Save the 5K you receive as a gift which you did not work for. Save a substantial amount of your salary. Save and save. Nothing is too small.

My hubby and I started saving the moment we knew about this route. Like I said earlier, you do not have to wait until you have N5m naira stacked somewhere to start, you can start as soon as you get 100K or even less.

For clarity, I would divide the money needed for your relocation into two parts.

A. Saving for your Proof of Funds. This requires a more deliberate and intentional act of saving to achieve a definite goal. To achieve this faster, saving is done in large sums. However, borrowing money is permitted if there are no chances of ever been able to save for your POF.

B. Saving to start the Application process. This requires a continuous or progressive habit of saving money regardless of how little the sum is. A little 10k here, a little 20 here…can be totaled until you get the amount needed for the first documentation process.

One of the ways I achieved my goal was through piggy banks, i.e putting lose notes in my local wooden bank, ensuring that I do not break the bank until a particular period of time. This may not work for you, I therefore encourage you to do what works for you.

Piggy bank (sometimes penny bank or money box) is the traditional name of a coin container normally used by children and adults. The piggy bank is known to collectors as a “still bank” as opposed to the “mechanical banks” popular in the early 20th century. These items are also often used by companies for promotional purposes. The use of the name ‘piggy bank’ gave rise to its widely recognized ‘

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The Nigerian-like Piggy bank otherwise called Kolo.

Rules to saving in your Piggy Bank.

  • Start today.
  • No procrastination. You never achieve or enjoy the dividends of what you’ve never started.
  • How do you start? If you can’t get one at the moment, start with using a plastic bottle.
  • Try as much as possible to put in notes daily; loose notes that you’ll normally spend on frivolities or money from side hustle, cash gifts etc.
  • No low domination notes, please. If you must put this into your bank, please have a separate piggy bank for this. The goal here is to get as much as possible at the end of your saving period. Low denomination notes would ruin this.
  • Be committed to this. This sounds cliché but you wouldn’t go far in this without discipline. Discipline would keep you in check, prevent you from breaking your bank before your due date.
  • It doesn’t matter if you have to break your bank earlier than your probable date to meet a need. That’s the whole essence of this project – to have money handy to meet you during your rainy day.
  • Think of the joy of delaying gratification while saving. This would sustain you while you save.
  • Remove your savings before any expense. This would prevent you from saving after you’ve spent all your earnings or saving below your target.
  • Piggy banks are different from investment plans. I can’t stress this enough. The money in your piggy bank does NOT grow. You only get an accumulated funds of what you’ve saved over a period of time.
  • Keep your piggy bank away from thieves and external persons. My hubby did an excellent job in helping safe guard my bank whenever I was away.
  • If for any reason you open your bank and the money is stolen, it means somebody stole from it. It is not jazz. Stop giving credit to diabolic powers and be careful of who has come into your safe corner, who knows about your bank or who monitors you.

On all my social media platforms, I have encouraged people to save and share their piggy bank stories with me. I would implore you to read my stories here and here. If you will like to share your piggy bank story with me, please contact me here.

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On this day…it was my semi-last day of leaving the UK. My friends organized a send-forth for me. I was torn between being sad and happy. Sad that I never got a job to remain in the UK, and some other opportunities I lost, also happy that I achieved my saving goal, and also achieved outstanding grades in my study. But one thing kept me… I knew I would be back, someday, and somehow. I did not know how. or when…but I held on to this dream. Five years later, this dream came to pass. Location: Sheffield, UK

Remember, if you are planning on relocating, you have to learn strict financial discipline. The good news is anyone can develop financial discipline, including you. This takes a willingness to change and develop new habits. When you do, your finances will take a turn for the better – you’ll have more money, save more money, and build more financial security for you and your family.

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PART THREE

HOW TO RELOCATE TO CANADA THROUGH  THE EXPRESS ENTRY ROUTE

In the ranking of the world’s most influential passports, Canadian passport takes the 5th position, and this has given Canadian citizens the privilege to travel to many Countries all over the world, including the United States of America without hassle.

Due to the strong influence of the Canadian passport, Canadian citizens have the authority to enter a total of 101 Countries on a Visa-free basis.

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The benefits of buying a Canadian passport include guaranteed world travel to VISA free countries, fewer problems from border guards or customs and immigration officials and of course, free entry to the United States of America!

By ‘Visa-free’, it is understood that Canadians can enter these Countries without providing their Visas.

Some people might not believe it, but it is quite glaring that the Canadian passport is the one of the most amazing passport in the world. Google this to find out.

The current Canadian passport, which came into existence in 2015, is considered one of the most beautiful travel documents in the world. Needless to say, its usefulness outstrips that of many other Countries’ passports regarding the fact that it guarantees Canadians Visa-free access to over two thirds the number of Countries in the world.

So, how do you get to hold this Canadian passport, you may be asking.

The Canadian government has made this easy for almost everyone, through a process called Express Entry (EE). Express Entry is a selection system designed to select skilled workers for immigration to Canada from all over the world.

Canada is a nation of immigrants. The multicultural diversified culture in Canada is fascinating as well as breathtaking. Been the largest country in the world after Russia, Canada is just about 37 million in population despite having the second largest landmass in the world, making the vast majority of the country sparsely inhabited. This is the reason the Canadian government opened its doors to immigrants from all over the world through Express Entry route.

Express Entry is a completely electronic process involving the federal government, provincial governments, and Canadian employers.

“How do I start?” “What is the first thing to do”, are some of the questions I am frequently asked.

So, let’s get the ball rolling.

Step 1a – Take the quiz to find out if you are eligible.

Cost: FREE

The quiz is simple and you can do it by yourself here. Click on check eligibility and get started. If you have not done a language test before, give yourself a hypothetical test score and fill out your other information. I recommend that you give yourself a test score as high as you think you may get so you can know how much you have to put into preparations to get this desired score.

The general recommendation is 8777 in LSRW respectively (Listening, Speaking, Reading and Writing).

Put it other assumed answers as you fill the form. When asked how much you will be bringing to Canada, if you are a family of three, make sure you count to the third row and pick the third option. For a family of four, count to the fourth row and pick the forth option. Do this for other family sizes.

Step 1b – Calculate your point, using the CRS Calculator.

The CRS is a points-based system that is used to assess and score your profile and rank it in the Express Entry pool. Canada CRS Point calculator allocate points to the applicants based on three main factors. A. Core/human capital + B. Spouse or common-law partner + C. Transferability factors = Maximum 600 points. The CRS ranks eligible candidates for immigration to Canada through Express Entry under the following components:

  • core human capital factors;
  • accompanying spouse or common-law factors;
  • skill transferability factors; and
  • factors relating to a provincial nomination, a qualifying offer of arranged employment, Canadian study experience, a sibling in Canada, and/or French language ability.

There are a total of 1,200 points available under the Comprehensive Ranking System. For candidates without an accompanying spouse or common-law partner, there are:

  • a maximum of 500 points available for core human capital factors;
  • a maximum of 100 points available for skill transferability factors;
  • 600 points available for either a provincial nomination; or
  • up to 200 points available for a qualifying offer of arranged employment; and
  • up to 30 points for Canadian study experience.
  • up to 30 additional points for French language ability, combined with English language ability; and
  • a maximum of 15 points for a sibling in Canada.

For candidates with an accompanying spouse or common-law partner, there are:

  • a maximum of 460 points available for core human capital factors of the principal applicant;
  • a maximum of 40 points for the core human capital factors of the spouse or common-law partner;
  • 600 points available for either a provincial nomination; or
  • up to 200 points available for a qualifying offer of arranged employment; and
  • up to 30 points for Canadian study experience.
  • up to 30 additional points for French language ability, combined with English language ability; and
  • a maximum of 15 points for a sibling in Canada (one sibling of the principal applicant and the accompanying spouse/common-law partner is considered).

It is therefore important that you know what point gives you a good chance before you start. Calculate your score here

Step 1c – Find out what your work NOC is.

This is important because you can only claim work history in one NOC, which means that if you’ve jumped around from job description to job description, you will need to choose the one that you have the longest number of consistent years of work.

On the other hand, I am just told that you can combine NOCs but your primary NOC has to be at least one year of continuous full time work. This means that if you have worked different jobs, you can combine the experiences as long as one of them (the main NOC) is atleast for one year.

It is okay if you’ve changed jobs, but as long as your jobs have all been in one NOC, they count. Find your NOC here.

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On this day in August, I had returned from the UK the previous year. Few months later, I was called by a friend to be on her bridal train. I had my future planned ahead of me. I knew I was gonna leave Nigeria, I just did not know when. Location: Lagos, Nigeria

Step 2 – Register for the language test – IELTS General, etc

Time Required: 2 to 3 months

If you are eligible based on the quiz above, the next step is to register for the language test. Everyone applying for Canadian PR has to take a language test to show proficiency in either French or English. You get bonus points if you can prove both! I recommend that you give yourself a minimum of two to three months window to prepare for the language test.

For most people, this is the only thing you have in your control. Your age isn’t going to change, your work history won’t change much and you many need a few years to get an additional degree. So, even though you have been speaking English all your life, IELTS General and others are standardized tests to take and you have to know how the examiners want you to answer the questions they ask you.

Cost: 208 USD or 275 CAD or 75,000 Naira. I am not sure if this is changed now.

I am aware that there are two bodies that organize the IELTS exams.

  • International Development Program (IDP), Australia in partnership with MOD Education cost 68K
  • British Council (BC) cost 75K

The difference  between the two is Enquiry on Result. That is, if you want a remark on any of your modules, with BC it cost 15K while with MOD, it cost 46K. For both bodies, you can get a refund if there is a change in your score, while the fee is forfeited if there is no change in your score.

This is the official site to register for IELTS with British Council.

Here are British Council Practice Tests, IELTS LIZIELTS Buddy and IELTS Online Tests  to help you prepare for the IELTS General test. Please, do not take these practice guides for granted. They go a long way in ensuring you ace the test on a sitting.

Please note for the purpose of your relocation, you should write the IELTS GENERAL tests, not the Academic Tests which is the most common. The former is for immigration purposes while the latter is for study purposes. Do not make this mistake. If you do, you will still be required to take the right type of test as the academic test can not be switched for the general one.

See the approved language tests for Canadian PR here.

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Notice my ring? I liked to “show it off” all the time. Before this day, I had asked hubby if relocating was part of his long term plans. He answered in the affirmative. You know…I did not want to be married to a man who eats, breaths and sleeps Nigeria.  Location: Lagos, Nigeria

Step 3 – Prepare your documents for WES evaluation.

Cost: from 250 USD or 315 CAD or 83,000 Naira.

Time Required: 2-3 months 

Use the two or three months of IELTS preparation to also prepare your degree evaluation, so you can save time. Everyone who goes to school outside of Canada must go through this process. The Canadian IRCC has a list of certified organizations that can verify your degree and equate it with a Canadian one. The list of the organizations can be found here.

The most common on this side of the pond is World Educational Services. WES. Basically, they need to say that your degree is equivalent to so-so-and-so degree in Canada.

You can decide to evaluate your most recent degree or all your degrees. The IRCC only requires your most recent degree (your highest degree), however, you need to figure out what works best for you. I would advise that you evaluate ONLY your HIGHEST DEGREE. If you have both a Masters and Bachelors, you will only have to upload your Masters degree in your WES profile.

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One of those beautiful days where I just feeling myself. Oh! I remember, I had just bought this shoe and needed to show it off, lol. Location: Port Elizabeth, South Africa.

It is important to note that if you decide to upload both degrees under one WES profile, it costs the same as evaluating only one degree. This is the process:

  • Register an account with WES here.
  • Fill out a profile and provide information about your degree(s). Please, make sure every detail is correct and you cross-check a couple times.
  • Pay the evaluation fee of 220 CAD and the courier fee of 85 CAD (for them to ship your evaluation back to you). I recommend you pay the 85 CAD courier fee instead of the 7 CAD regular postage fee so that when your evaluation is returned, it is returned speedily and securely and doesn’t get stuck in the local post system. As soon as you pay, you will receive a unique WES Number.
    • Note: When you put in all your degree details, the WES system will automatically pull out the documents you are required to send to them for verification. For most countries, only transcripts are required. Unfortunately, those with Nigerian degrees are required to provide a whole lot more than before due to a number of people sending in falsified documents (Naija, why oh why?). This is where you need to decide whether to use only your higher degree if you have one from another country. List of requirements for Nigerian degrees:
      • Degree Certificate
      • Academic Transcripts
      • Final Secondary Examination Results
      • WAEC / NECO Scratch Card.

The requirements were the same for everyone until August 2018 when they couldn’t take the number of fraudulent documents coming their way from Nigeria anymore. Too bad!

  • Pay the evaluation fee of 220 CAD and the courier fee of 85 CAD (for them to ship your evaluation back to you). I recommend you pay the 85 CAD courier fee instead of the 7 CAD regular postage fee so that when your evaluation is returned, it is returned speedily and securely and doesn’t get stuck in the local post system. As soon as you pay, you will receive a unique WES Number.
  • Apply for your transcripts and documents. If your school has a cut-throat process, all the more reason to ensure that you have enough time to go through this process. Also, remember to factor in the cost for requesting transcripts.
  • Send your required documents to WES. Make sure you follow all the instructions. All transcripts and documents must be sealed and signed or stamped across the seal fold of the envelope and every envelope must have your WES number on it. Courier shipping via DHL from Lagos to the WES Toronto office costs about $65 or 86 CAD or 23,000 Naira
  • Wait for WES to receive your documents and complete your verification. It takes 20 working days from when they receive all your required document for them to send you an evaluation report. This is the report that you need for your Canadian PR application.

Please note that there are other evaluation bodies like ICES (International Credential Evaluation Service (ICES) here and IQAS  (International Qualifications Assessment Service) here.

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What would have happened if hubby said “no, he was not interested in pursuing second options” you’re wondering, right? Oh boy! I would have moved forward. Make love no blind my eye see where I dey go, lol. Location: Port Elizabeth, South Africa.

Step 4 – Take your IELTS Test & Get Results.

Time Required: 13 Days

The IELTS tests is four parts. Speaking. Reading. Listening and Writing. Your speaking test may be on a different date from your writing, reading and listening tests. You will receive an email a few weeks to your test date with details of your speaking test (usually the speaking test is the same week as your main test date). All the other three tests will be on the day you chose when you registered. Give the test your best shot, keep calm and pick up your results two weeks later. You will be able to pick up your results 13 days after your main test date.

NB: I have dedicated a whole chapter, Chapter Four on IELTS. Please scroll down to Chapter Four to read it.

Step 5 – Create an Online Express Entry Profile.

Now that you have your WES evaluation report and your language test results, you are ready to create an Express Entry profile. Real quick, use this tool to find out what your exact CRS Comprehensive Ranking System (CRS) Score will be.

Remember the quiz you did in 1b, right? This time, you have the actual information and you can tell what your exact CRS score will be. You don’t know what the cut off score will be but you can check what the cut-off for the last draw was (the week or two weeks before you check) here. That way, you have an idea whether you stand a high chance in the pool or not.

This profile will close within 60 days of opening it if you do not submit, so try to complete it as soon as you can. You will be asked personal information, work history, test scores, degree details, etc. All these details will add up to give you a CRS. Make sure you are truthful and consistent. As soon as you complete and cross-check your Express Entry profile, go ahead and submit it.

You have now officially joined the Express Entry Pool.

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Prior to this day, I had lost my job…and few weeks after, I got this contract job. Relatively good pay, not a permanent job, but I was still grateful to God. Location: Lagos, Nigeria

Step 6 – Wait for an Invitation to Apply (ITA). 

This happens when you have entered the pool, with all relevant details and waited to be invited to apply (ITA).

Every two weeks, a draw is made from the pool of submitted Express Entry profiles and you are in the pool with several others. This draw is done to offer ITAs to candidates. An ITA basically says…’you can now begin the official application process for PR.

The exact cut-off score is determined by the number of selections the committee plans to choose from that draw. For example, if the Canadian Government needs 3,500 selections from that draw, they pick the highest 3,500 candidates in the pool on that date and the 3500th person’s score becomes the cut-off score. If there is a tie for the 3500th person, they use factors like date and time of submission to break the tie. Just as a guideline, the cut-off scores for January and February, 2019 were as follows: 449, 443 and 438 and recent score in May have shot up to about 452 in the recent draw.

See the full list of cut-off scores here.

If you are one of the top candidates with an extremely high score, you can receive an ITA in the next draw from when you submit your profile. Technically, if you submit your profile today and the draw is tomorrow, you can get an ITA in one day. However, if your score falls short, you can stay in the pool and keep doing other things to improve your score.

See a detailed explanation on ways to improve your score while you’re in the Express Entry pool. After 12 months, if you don’t get selected from the pool, it will expire and you will have to create a new one.

Also, white waiting for an ITA, you can register in the Job Bank or Indeed and start looking for jobs in Canada.

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One of those pretty good days in South Africa. I guess I was wondering why ordinary SA looks better than awa “giant of Africa”. Lol! Location: Port Elizabeth, SA.

Step 7 – Apply for Canadian Permanent Residency (PR)

Cost: 785 USD or 1,040 CAD or N282,600 Naira per adult applicant.

113 USD or 150 CAD or 54,000 Naira per dependent children.

Time Required: 6 months.

Now that you have been invited to apply, you will need to prepare your application and submit all your documents. It is important to note that your fee of 1,040 CAD is split into 550 CAD application fee and 490 CAD right to permanent residence (PR) fee. If you do not successfully get PR, the 490 CAD will be refunded to you. You only have 60 days to complete this application!

Documents Required:

  • Application Fee (see above)
  • IELTS Test Results
  • Academic Verification Report from WES or any other approved body.
  • Digital Photographs
  • Medical Examination – every country has an approved list of panel physicians who can provide a medical examination. In Nigeria, there are three in Lagos and one in Abuja and the costs may vary slightly. See here to find their addresses and book an appointment.
  • Police Certificates – if you have lived in a country for more than 6 months in a row, since you turned 18 years or within the last ten years, you have to include police reports from each of those countries (including your home country, where you currently live). The cost of obtaining a police certificate will differ based on where you live and where you are requesting one from. See how to get a police certificate in each country.

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Here, our Application had been approved a month earlier and I was counting down to relocating. See as I fresh na, lol! Location: Abuja, Nigeria. 

For me, I had to get police certificates from South Africa, the United Kingdom and of course Nigeria, while my husband had to get police certificate from Ghana because we had lived in these countries for over six months at different points in our lives.

  • Passport Biodata Page
  • Reference or Experience Work Letter – your former and current employers listed on your Express Entry Profile must all provide letters to prove your work history with them. NB: For more information on the Reference letter, please read here.
  • Proof of Funds – you must provide a letter from your bank vouching for the availability of funds required for relocation. These are the amount required for relocation:
    • 1 Family Member (you alone) : 12,669 CAD or 3.46 million Naira
    • 2 Family Members : 15,772 CAD or 4.61 million Naira
    • 3 Family Members : 19,390 CAD or 5.50 million Naira
    • 4 Family Members : 23,542 CAD or 6.73 million Naira
    • 5 Family Members : 26,701 CAD or 7.89 million Naira
    • 6 Family Members : 30,114 CAD or 8.42 million Naira
    • 7 Family Members : 33,528 CAD or 9.35 million Naira
    • For each additional family member : $3,414 or 932,000 Naira.

NB: For more details on proof of funds, please read this.

  • Other Documents – depending on whether you have children, you are divorced, married, and so on, there is a host of other documents required including name change certificatebirth certificate of child(ren)marriage certificate, etc. Find the full details here.

Once you have all your complete documents, you will be able to fill out your application on the portal and upload scanned copies of all your documents. Please make sure you fill the application portal properly and patiently as any mistake or inconsistency can disqualify your application. Make sure you also follow the guidelines for clarity, size and resolution of all documents. You will also be able to make your payment.

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…studying in the UK. This was ever first time of eating Pizza and traveling out of my local community. My studies in the UK was the period the scales fell off my eyes…and I knew I am created for something more. Location: Sheffield, UK

Step 8 – Bio-metrics

At some point, you may be called to submit your bio metrics at a local embassy or VFS. Please wait for this.

Step 9 – Wait and live your life!

After submitting the documents and paying the Immigration fees, the Canadian Immigration officers verifies the documents and information provided. This generally takes maximum of 6 months depending on the application type, countries a person has resided in and most importantly, the immigration visa office where the application has been sent for processing and how much application backlog is in that country.

There are three different visa offices that processes applications coming from Nigeria. The Accra, Ghana visa office, The London, UK Visa Office and the Ottawa, Canada visa office.

The Ghana office is known for spending eternity on visa applications, while the Ottawa, Canada office is the fastest of all, completing application in record time. The London office is between fast and slow. Unfortunately, you can not determine where your application goes to. Immediately you pay the application fees, and click send, it is randomly sent to any of this three offices. But while waiting, you may send a request asking which office yours is so as to know how to intensify your prayers. Fortunately, ours went to the Ottawa, Canada office.

According to the IRCC, 80% of all applicants receive a response within 6 months. Just spend 6 months worrying. If you are a Christian like me, you may need to pray or just go about your business. You can log into your profile from time to time to check what stage your application has reached. For some people, it comes in less than 3 months and for other it almost six months! For some, it extends even longer! It doesn’t matter, just keep living your life.

Our application took 3 months and 27 days. We were four days into the fourth month when we received the golden mail that our application had been approved! Our excitement was out of this world!

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On this day in August of that year..though I looked happy, so many thoughts were running through my mind. Our application was two months in process. What happens if we are rejected? What happens to the several people I had told we were relocating? How do I go back to tell them we were denied? But FAITH held me on. Location: Abuja, Nigeria.

Step 10 – Receive a PPR – Passport Request email – Ready for Visa

Once you get this email, you can send in your passports. Your passport is sent to the Ghana visa issuing office for stamping. Your PR approval will also come with a deadline when you have to enter into Canada or else your PR will be invalidated. This is usually 1 year from the day you had your medicals.

This means that if you had your medicals on the 17th of May 2019, you must leave Nigeria before the 17th of May 2020. Your application would definitely come between this period. Only on few occasions do your medicals expire while your application is still in process. If this happens, you will be notified by CIC to retake your medicals.

Step 11 – Welcome to Canada – Start making plans to come!

Cost – Travel Cost of each applicant

Step 12: Receive PR card (2–3 months)

Official PR Card processing time is 62–65 days and the PR card will be couriered to the address given by the applicants at the time of their landing. The address has to be a Canadian address.

PR Card will be delivered to the address within 50–80 days. In case you have performed soft landing (temporary migration) just to fulfill the landing formalities before the Visa expires, you can request any friend coming to your native country to bring along your PR card.

PR cards are not couriered outside Canada and have to be delivered in person in such scenarios.

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To the man who listened when I told him about this route, keyed into this ‘vision’…ran with it like a man who had seen the light. Temi, thank you for everything you do. Location: Ontario, Canada

Step 12: You are Canadian permanent resident. Enjoy!

Once you have your PR card, you are officially a Canadian PR. Have fun!

PR card is provided with a validity of 5 years. A person is supposed to live in Canada for 730 days in consecutive 5 years to continue his/her PR card for next 5 years after the expiry.

If a person has stayed in Canada for more than 1095 days in consecutive 3 years, he/she is eligible to apply for Canadian citizenship.

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When I received the news that my application had been granted. I danced like David danced! It was a dream come true…not just for me but for everyone who cared about me. Dress: My bigsis, IG: @Mofashionsmirror, Abuja, one of dresses I “stole” from her. Location: Abuja, Nigeria

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PART FOUR –

THE ALMIGHTY IELTS…HOW DO I PASS THIS EXAM??

Whether for study or immigration purposes, IELTS is a COMPULSORY exam you MUST take. Unfortunately, you can’t relocate to Canada without having to write this exam, except you’re coming on a visiting Visa.

Although, IELTS is not rocket science, unfortunately many people do not get high band scores and sometimes fail the tests even after multiple attempts.

Why is this so?

IELTS is not rocket science. However, it is not called a language proficiency test for nothing.

The thing with IELTS is that, aside proficiency (knowing the correct answer), speed and accuracy are inversely proportional.
It is either you are fast and make a lot of errors or you try to be very accurate and you do not complete the test at all.

Even if you can work at a good pace, there are loads of trick questions you will get wrong if you have not mastered the techniques to answer them.

So what do you need to do to ensure you develop not only proficiency but speed and accuracy to pass IELTS at your first or next attempt?

How do you confidently prepare for your test especially if you cannot afford to pay for coaching or take extra classes?

The book IELTS Success Hacks, will answer all your questions.

IELTS Success Hacks, a book written by Ebenezer Opeyemi Anifowose, a Band 8.5 IELTS Coach, documents all the top tips and tricks he used to achieve a Band 8.5 in the IELTS test with only two weeks of practice. The book also contains the best tips from IELTS coaches from around the world.

Guess what? This e-book costs only N5,000.

If you ever have to rewrite IELTS, it will cost you over N73,000 but with only N5,000, you can prepare yourself to ensure you write the test confidently and achieve your desired band score once and for all.To read more about the book or to make payment, click this link 👇      

IELTS SUCCESS HACKS

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Pay via bank transfer to
Sterling Bank
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Ebenezer Anifowose
Then send a proof of payment to Ebenezer on Whatsapp, 2348038555960
***********THIS BOOK COMES HIGHLY RECOMMENDED BY ME***************

PLEASE DO NOT FORGET TO FILL OUR THE CONTACT FORM AND MENTION WHO REFERRED YOU FOR THE BOOK.

PART FIVE

FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS

  • I do not have the money to relocate. How do I do it?

Please check Part 2 of this post which details how I achieved my saving goal. Alternatively, if you do not have enough funds for this process, you may wait until you are able to do so. Do this in your time, not in anyone’s and ensure you are convinced and ready for your big move.

  • I am scared of losing my job. How do I manage the two?

This is one of the questions people have asked me and raised valid fears about. Many people who have good jobs in Nigeria, are torn between resigning their jobs and relocating. What do you do in cases like this?

To solve this problem,  “Temporary landing” comes in handy. What this means is that when you have gotten your application approved, take a few days off work, come to Canada to register your presence and return back to Nigeria. At the point of landing, ensure you get your Social Insurance Number (SIN) and process your Permanent Residency card.

SIN Number is a nine-digit number that allows you to work in Canada or to have access to government programs and benefits. A SIN is issued to one person only and it cannot legally be used by anyone else. Your PR card is a proof that you are a permanent resident of Canada, can be shown at point any country’s point of entry.

At the point of landing, you will be requested to provide a Canada address where your PR card would be delivered to. What people do is to give the address of a family or friend in Canada so that their card can be delivered to them, and if you have somebody coming back to Nigeria who can bring the card for you, that’s great because you will need the PR on your next entry into Canada. Unfortunately, the card can not be couriered outside Canada, neither can you provide a Nigerian address for its delivery.

After you have done all necessary paper work in Canada and shown a physical presence at the Canadian border, you are welcome to return back to Nigeria and plan your resignation or keep working, all this depends on you.

This way, you are able to use a stone to kill two birds. The only disadvantage to soft landing is that you will spend more money in terms of ticket fare and may not be eligible to have goods follow you on your next return. “Goods to follow” are accompanying stuff like foodstuff, furniture,  pets and other items you will need to ease your settling down. These items are often cargoed separately.

  • What are my chances of getting a job in Canada?

The chances of getting a job here depends on your field and how well you are able to understand the Canadian work culture fast enough and time. Unfortunately this time is different with everyone and varies from persons to persons.

In other that you’re doing things the right way, I would advise that as soon as your application comes through, and your passport has been returned to you with your visa on it, immediately register for courses in SOPA and ACCES. They are Canadian government bodies helping immigrants to get settled with respect to job search, writing your resume in the Canadian way, understanding the Canadian workplace etc. To register, you will need to have completed the whole process and have your application. You can not register for this programs until you have your Confirmation of Permanent Residency (COPR).

Please do well to register for each of this courses and start inculcating yourself into the Canada work place.

I’d also advise you don’t rush into landing after your application has been approved, except you genuinely don’t have enough time left.  Your ability to take these courses depend on how much time you’ve got before you land. A three to four months break is good to study all these courses and equip yourself with all relevant information they provide.

I must tell you that the information you’ll get from these bodies are totally different with what’s obtainable in Nigeria. This programmes helps you to expand your knowledge of the culture here, and eases off some of the culture shock that is expected to hit you when you land.

Getting a job can happen as fast as you want it, while for some it does not happen so fast.  Please, have no fears, people get jobs within their shortest possible time of been in Canada. Please note that this time varies from person to person and can’t exactly be predicted. What’s important is that you’re doing the right thing, equipped with the right knowledge and moving with the right set of people.

On the other hand, some people start with menial jobs in order to pay their bills. While I would not advise this, because of the difficulty of breaking out of such terrain, remember that any job, regardless of the pay is a good start to have Canadian experience and pay your bills.

  • For a family of four, for instance, do we all have to sit for the IELTS exam?

Oh no! Your children do not need to sit for the exam, they just need to have undergo a medical examination and have their international passports. However, you and your spouse may take the exam. The exam is only compulsory for the principal applicant and not compulsory for the supporting applicant. I would advise that if you are a supporting applicant, you may write the exam to boost your chances or scores.

For instance, my husband was the principal applicant in our application. Using his IELTS alone in our application earned us 448 points. We entered the pool immediately using just only his result because my IELTS result was seized for random investigation checks prior to entering the pool.  At the time we entered the pool, the CRS draw point was 441 giving us ITA immediately we entered the pool . When my result was eventually released four months after, even though I did not have fantastic grades, with a band score of 6.5, our points rose from 448 to 468 points. That’s twenty whopping points because I wrote the exam and verified my degrees!  All we needed to do was update our profile in the pool prior to submitting our application and explain why our scores went higher after receiving ITA.

Supporting applicants generally evaluate their own degrees and write the exam do so to increase their points on their application especially if it’s a family application.

On the other hand, I have a friend who did nothing. She did not have to write IELTS nor even evaluate her degree because her husband’s points who was the principal applicant was enough to get them an ITA. The only downside is that you may still need to write the exam and still evaluate your degree when you come to Canada if you’re coming here to study.

  • I have been denied a visa before. Would it affect my chances?

NO! It would not affect your chances. However, while filling the online application portal, please ensure to make sure that this is clearly stated if you are asked. People get denied everyday so this should not be a problem, and as far as I know this does not affect your application.

  • I am a medical professional, what are my chances in Canada?

I do not know a lot ’bout the medical profession in Canada, but what I do know is that you must be willing to start all over again if you do decide to relocate to Canada. I am told, (not confirmed), that the medical exams in Nigeria is not recognized in Canada as such, many doctors who relocated from Nigeria into Canada, had to write their licensing exams all over again or some relocated to other countries where there is some sort of recognition. Please make your inquiries, ask questions and be well updated before planning this move as a medical doctor.

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The way I smile when I realise how merciful and grateful God has been to me! Picture taken in Abuja, Nigeria by one of the best hands. Photography Credit: Godwin Oisi Photography. Top: My bigsis. IG: @Mofashionsmirror, Abuja, one of the clothes I “stole” from her. Location: Abuja, Nigeria

  • Would my proof of funds be withheld by the Canada government?

Your proof of funds is YOUR money. It is not going to be taken away from you. You own it. All the Canadian government wants to see is that you have this money access to this money when you need it. It is expected and normal that you will need to settle down and each of this  settling down actions (accommodation, getting your car, starting your drivers license etc) costs money, therefore this is where your POF comes in handy.

Also, before you get a job and become eligible to some benefits, this money would be needed to sustain you pending this period. Except the money is borrowed,  in that case would need to be returned to your creditor, you own your money and nobody is gonna take it from you. Please note that this money can be in form of investment, mutual funds, treasury bills etc.

  • I have been failing IELTS for a number of times, What do I do?

I want you to know that I deeply sympathize with you. I know how frustrating it gets having to pay 75K at each attempt and yet missing your goal by a mere .5 mark. But, I would encourage to give it another try and perhaps do something different this time. Reach out to those who you know passed, ask what they did, what helped them etc. Most importantly, please do not give up. Remember the reason why you decided to take the exam in the first place. Keep this at the back of your mind as you rewrite your exams.

  • Can I get a job offer in Nigeria before relocating to Canada?

To the best of my knowledge, there are about three or four stages prior to getting a job offer- Sending in your application (resume), the first phone interview from the HR, which could be a Skype interview, a one one one interview with the HR and a member of staff, followed by series of  interviews with other manages and partners of the company…all happens before the offer comes.

Now, if you have not landed yet, it may be impossible to skip all stages to get an offer while been in Nigeria because at some point in the recruitment process, you will need to appear in person.

I do know that people get interviewed through Skype prior to landing and on landing finish up with the other stages of interview. If the next stage comes while you are still in Nigeria, please request to reschedule until you are available in Canada. Unlike Nigeria, your hiring chances is NOT zeroed because you have to reschedule a date.

However, most job offers do not come until you have landed, this is because while sending your resume, you will need to have a Canadian address and Canadian phone number on your resume. It is very easy for a recruiter to pass off your resume if your details are not in Canada.

  • Do I need a travel agent to help me through the process?

I do not see a reason why you have to use an agent. Agent fees are very high, some of which run to millions of naira depending on your family size. All that this process requires is through reading and attention to details.  I have taken my time to explain (with links) everything you need to do or know. However, if you can afford an agent, without it digging a hole in your pocket, please go ahead.

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Just feeling myself… counting my days.

Location: Abuja, Nigeria

  • For someone who is not working, how easy is it to relocate?

I am not sure I have direct answers to this, but I do know that my friend was not working and she relocated to Canada. How did she do it? Her husband was the principal applicant and he stated it in his application that she was his accompanying dependent. So if you or your spouse is not working, provided one of you is working who can be the principal applicant, this would be fine. I do not think you are eligible if you can not claim a work experience of even a year, However, I may be wrong. This is the reason the eligibility test is very important before you start thinking of relocating. Find it here.

  • Do I need to be married before I start?

No! You do not need to be married before you start this process. You can start as a single person. This means that you will be applying as a single applicant without a dependent. If you are in a relationship, you can still go ahead and apply as a single applicant and let your significant other do the same. On the other hand, if you wish to wait till you are married to apply as a couple, this is fine. All that you need to show as proof of your marriage is your wedding certificate issued by the Federal Republic of Nigeria.

  • My spouse is not interested in relocating. What do I do?

This is such a difficult situation and while I do not have clear answers on what could be done, I know this is very frustrating and I sincerely sympathize with your situation. I would say that you keep praying and hoping and also encouraging him or her to give this route a try. Get your spouse this blog to read. Also, research benefits of being a Canadian citizen and let him or her know this immense benefit that abound.

Similarly, you also have to know the exact reason your spouse is not interested. Could it be a reluctance to take risks? The myth that those who relocate go on to do menial jobs? Or your spouse is just comfortable where he or she is? Whatever it is, please I encourage you to be patient with him or her. Listen to their fears and do your best to encourage them to give themselves the privilege of holding a Canadian passport, not just for themselves but your children as well.

If you need me to speak to your spouse to answer more questions, please reach me here. I would do my best to help in whatever way I can.

NB: Please note that I do this for a fee and be sure you are ready to make payment before you reach out to me.

  • What other information would I need that would be useful for me?

Please come with as much money as you can gather. If you can come with more money than your Proof of funds requires, please do. You will need to get settled with accommodation, looking for jobs at your cost, and this would require you to travel from place to place, pay your phone bills etc. Ensure you bring as much money as you can.

Two. I want you to know that you may be starting all over again. There would be initial teething problems. Do not let this scare you at all. Unlike Nigeria, Canada boosts of several opportunities which are available to everyone regardless of what you wanna do. As such, you are free to do anything you wish at whatever age you desire. Nobody cares your age, looks, religion or nationality and respect is accorded to everyone regardless of your status and age, color, religion, and nationality. Do not be scared of starting again, if you have to, if you are changing professions or just finding your feet somewhere.

Three. Ensure you define your associations. Negative people would ruin your chances of success. These people may necessarily be bad people, it could just be their own reality so please move with positive minded people because it’s important you set your mind right and remain positive. Remember, your chances of moving higher is largely dependent on who you move with and who you listen to. Be positive in your pursuit. Be your own cheerleader even when things don’t look good or appear slow.

Never forget. Watch your associations.

Four. It still boils down to what you wanna do. Be specific. Be clear. Streamline your path.

Are you starting a business? Going back to school? Continuing with your profession from Nigeria? Starting on another path entirely? Be very clear.

I always tell people it’s important to be very clear and specific on what you want to do before you land, so that you can get the ground running or at least not be swayed by all the information you’ll get here. Truth is, there is so much to digest, so much available and accessible, and as such, you need your own clear head and path to know which direction to focus on. Too much information dey confuse person if you no sabi which path you dey go. That’s why it’s important you know where exactly you’re heading.

  • I have read everything but I do not seem to get enough marks to qualify.

I understand this is the plight of some people who have already passed the age of 39, lack education or can’t scale through high scores for IELTs who can do little or nothing to improve their scores. But all hope is not lost. Have you heard of PROVINCIAL NOMINATION PROGRAMME? (PNP) If no, please read here. To apply as a provincial nominee of any province, you must:

  1. meet the minimum requirements of one of the province or territory’s non-Express Entry streams.
  2. be nominated under that stream.
  3. You do not necessarily have to have the band-score of 8777 in LSRW like it is done in the express entry route. A band-score of 6.5-7.0 is fair enough. However, please check with your province and be sure of their individual requirement.

Basically, Canada has ten provinces (states, as it is called in Nigeria) and any of this provinces can nominate you. Once this is done, you get additional 600 points added to your CRS score, thus, this makes it possible for you to meet the cutoff mark and get ITA. The only downside is that you have to live in that province for a minimum of three years before you can relocate anywhere else in Canada.

  • I have some other questions bothering me.

You may send me a message through the contact form here. Please be aware that I CAN NO LONGER respond to messages due to the difference in time zone I am working with, the influx of messages coming to me, and some other activities that need my attention, hence, priority would ONLY be given to PAID consultations. You can book for a paid session with me here. 

As said previously, be comfortable that you are willing to pay for my time before you send an email.

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PART FIVE

SOME ACRONYMS FREQUENTLY USED IN THIS POST AND DURING VISA PROCESSING.

CLB – Canadian Language Benchmark
ECA – Education Credential Assessment
EE – Express Entry
NOC – National Occupation Classification
ROI – Round of Invitations
ITA – Invitation to Apply
CoPR – Confirmation of Permanent Residency
PPR – Passport Request
PR – Permanent Resident (Residency)
LSRW – Listening. Speaking. Reading and Writing

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The way I dance when I know I have fulfilled my promise to you all by writing this long post. It took me several days to come up with this…but I had to do this because I care about you and your future. I hope you will return the favor by following my blog. Please help my blogging ministry o! Location: Abuja, Nigeria.

If you will like to join a Facebook group strictly for Nigerians desiring to relocate, please click From Nigeria to Canada to join this group. This group is free to join and every information shared is also free. If you know anyone sharing any paid information, please report to me, or the admin or other moderators of the group. This group is a startup and we may not be able to answer all complicated questions but we try. We are no immigration lawyers there.

On the other hand, an ONLY PAID group is coming up shortly for those interested in provincial nomination (PNP), study and scholarships admissions and other legal relocation process. Please follow me on Omobolanle- Facebook to find out more. Admission into this group would not be free. Details would be announced here when it’s up, and on my Facebook wall. Stay Tuned.

So guys! We have now come to end of this journey. If you are still reading this, I must thank you for reading through till the end and I hope you will follow each of the steps to the letter. Please share this link with friends and family and encourage them to also share with their friends and loved ones.

Do not keep this to yourself. Do not hoard. Bless somebody else. 

You could also follow on Facebook here and like my Facebook page here.

If you have questions for me, or you need me to respond to your own peculiar situation, please feel free to contact me here. Before you do, remember I DO NOT RESPOND TO RELOCATION QUESTIONS FOR FREE. 

NB: Again, I am only able to respond to those who are willing to pay for my time. If you are not comfortable with this, Please DO NOT send me an email.

Please aware that I DO NOT FORMALLY REPRESENT YOU at any hearing or court. I am NOT an immigration lawyer. Thus, you are not paying me to process your application or guarantee you any kind of visa. My fees are strictly for those who wish to talk to me further and PAY FOR MY TIME.

If this guideline has helped you, please return the favor by following my blog HERE and following me on IG: here. This would mean so much to me.

I wish you the very best in all your endeavors. May God’s favor attend to your ways and give you ease. Amen

DISCLAIMER.

Please note that this article MAY NOT cover every single aspect of immigrating to Canada through the Express Entry route. I am not an Immigration consultant or lawyer and not obligated to give you a day to day update on this process. 

I am only as updated as when I processed my application in November 2018. Rules may have checked, fees may have been updated over the months or years by the Canadian government. It is therefore your SOLE RESPONSIBILITY to update yourself with ALL current information and details from the CIC website: here. I, Omobolanle Adeyemo (Omoby) would not be held responsible for any mistake or error you make arising from the aforementioned.

WARNING.

ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. No part of this information may be reproduced, copied, written in any electronic manner, recorded, photocopied or posted on blogs, websites, sent to a third party for same,  without an express permission of the Author. Otherwise, legal actions may be taken against plagiarist. 

~ Omobolanle Adeyemo, May 2019

About to Wed?

In a bid not to appear hateful or jealous, I really want to appeal to would-be couples to please cut cost on wedding expenses and focus on building your home together: making it comfortable and worth living for you both. Buy a car. Get your apartment tastefully furnished. Buy foodstuffs in your kitchen. Think beyond the wedding day. When all guests are gone, where would you be heading to? A hut? A cave? A mansion? A home? A shed?

For me, it’s extremely pathetic when I see couples have lavish wedding, yet move into a tiny one bedroom apartment with just a mattress and a wrapper as curtains. For some, the days after the wedding starts a life of misery and penury. It’s sad.

Forget about the talk of wedding being a “once in a lifetime” affair and you want to break the bank, run into debts and go all the way. Do you know your Marriage is forever affair and you’ll live with the financial choices you make.

No! I would understand if you’re not financially capable to afford a comfortable place. I’d understand that it’s not everyone who moves into their own houses or have it all furnished. I am talking about those who ignorantly or in the quest to impress friends, guests and society, spend so much, unnecessarily costs to make their day a funfare, yet could have saved some costs into furnishing and building their homes. It’s sad joooh. Or doing some other stuff.

What’s more sad is many go into debts, and living the next few months after the fairy-tale wedding paying these debts.

A colleague of mine told me of how his wedding was on all wedding blogs and magazines in town, yet he spent the next one year paying debts and balancing vendors. He said if he would go back to rewind that part of his life, he’d go back to cut unnecessary costs and focus more on his home with his wife. He was telling me this to learn from his story.

Another friend had a society wedding, but had to move into tiny self contained apartment which she told me was so unbearable for her and her hubby. She told me she wished she and her hubby had cut down a lot of their wedding expenses. She was also telling me this to learn from her story. When I paid her a visit, I felt very sorry for her. I couldn’t reconcile the lavish wedding pictures almost on all blogs and wedding websites with the present state they were in.

Remember, the wedding is just a day’s event. Many would forget what you wore and what meat they didn’t eat or what souvenirs they didn’t get. However, for your own home, where you would go back to sleep after the whole paparazzi…how is it? Are you going back to a one bedroom unfurnished flat? Are you going back to using kerosene stoves because you didn’t cut down wedding costs to put your kitchen appliances in place? Are you going back to drinking garri and eating groundnuts because you didn’t think foodstuffs in your kitchen would be necessary?

Think. Think. And think again.

Disclaimer: I didn’t say that having a lavish wedding isn’t good. No! I am appealing that if you must have or fancy a lavish wedding, be sure that your home is properly furnished and comfortable. Please.

  • ~ Omoby, 2017